Erin: So we are spending A LOT of time together with this blog. We are also spending lots of time doing all of the other things we committed to doing BEFORE we decided to create The Sisterhood. This week is Bazaar Week for me. If you do not go to a school that runs a bazaar, bless your lucky stars. Insert any other school event that takes weeks to plan and nearly one hundred volunteers to pull off. The soundtrack of my life this week is basically my ringtone.
Ellen: Our time together means I am in the presence of her ringtone A LOT: a new age/zen crap stanza. But to be fair, it might not be the tune that bugs me so much as the fact that it is an evil lie! This thing goes off constantly, and there is NOTHING zen about 97.9% of the calls that come through.
Erin: Remember the trailer for Family Guy where the little kid says, “Mom, Mom, Mom, Mommy, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom.” And the mom finally says, “what?” And he says, “Hi.” Something about those calls really reminds me of that.
Ellen: So really it is not the tune, but the life-draining, joy-sucking requests that come in with every third call. I’m sure of this because when I was an intern, I smashed my beeper against the wall during one particularly bad night of bouncing between the ER, labor and delivery, and the oncology ward. I was not rewarded with a new beeper. I had to put it back together with surgical tape and rubber bands. As a result, my beep was transformed into a kind of sick mewling. But that distorted “waa, waa” actually made me feel satisfied, like vengeance was mine. So it is not the noise, but what it brings.
Erin: And, to be honest, a lot of what it brings has the potential to make my eyes roll, but this is what I signed up for, so I listen and put out the fires, massage the egos, and move the event forward. And I mainly try not to pass judgment. Let’s face it, some of the calls are ridiculous and unnecessary, and I am certain that if the woman on the other end had taken even two seconds to think, she would not have kick-started my new age/zen crap stanza into life. (It’s a credit to my intrinsic coping mechanisms that I cannot recall an exact example of this. You are just going to have to trust me on this one.) So, I take my phone’s advice and go to the zen place. I remember that these women are all trying to make their kids’ school a better place just like me. I also note that we all have different limits of what we can juggle. Some people can juggle 12 flaming torches interspersed with three buzzing chainsaws, while others are barely managing keeping three foam balls in the air. There is no better, just different.
Ellen: And to take this one step further, as part of The Sisterhood, let’s all just agree to not pass judgment—about any of it—PERIOD. Just because you work outside of the home AND are the treasurer for the parent organization, don’t pass judgment on how much a stay-at-home mother is volunteering at school. She may be devoting hours to her church and taking care of a sick relative to boot. And before anyone starts to feel superior, don’t judge the working mom who brings the store-bought cookies and never seems to participate. This may be her 4th kid in your elementary school and 15 years ago she was PTA president AND head of the winter bash, but now she is just tired and busy running two teenagers around to water polo, tai chi, and yodeling lessons six days a week. Hook a sister up, but give her a break. We have different limits. And here is the Sisterhood Secret: the most tolerable Sisters are those that are honest about their limits, but honor the commitments they have made.
But just in case it is the ringtone getting on my last nerve, any suggestions? I was thinking “Brass Monkey” by the Beastie Boys.
