Monday Listicles is always one of the best things about a new week, so we are linking up again. Check out some great lists there!
This week, Marina Star asked us to make a list of Ten Guilty Pleasures. Before Ellen left on her week-long cruise (a REAL pleasure—no guilt at all), we brainstormed this list. Enjoy! Erin
“Oh, the places you’ll go” sayeth ole Dr. Seuss. One stop for many of us on this road of life is Motherhood. For those of us hanging out in this ‘hood, we might suggest tweaking this pearl of wisdom to “Oh, the things you will miss”. Once you have popped that baby out of your uterus, the simple joys may not be gone, but they have changed irrevocably and forever. Things that you used to do without thinking become, well, more difficult to fit in.
Things like:
1. Exercise—This may have once been a great way for you to burn off some steam or to get your butt in gear for this season’s fashions, but once you give birth, getting to the gym, heck, getting into your gym-WEAR becomes infinitely more complicated. When to go, where to go, should you go, did you go (yeah, that’s right, sometimes we are so sleep-deprived we can’t remember IF we did or just really, really meant to) are burning questions. If and when we get to exercise, it just feels great—an hour to ourselves, doing something good for us, relieving stress. Win, Win, Win.
2. Going Out to Lunch with a Friend—My baby is headed to kindergarten, and I still think it’s a heady affair to have a simple lunch date with a friend. The uninterrupted hour or two of adult conversation NOT punctuated by the need to cut someone else’s food, fill someone’s cup, or correct someone’s behavior is pure heaven. The pure joy of time spent with a friend is a huge bonus as well.
3. Bad TV—Some of you may love the soaps (although I hear they are an endangered species) or have to get your Jerseylicious on, I do not judge. Bad TV is one of my favorite kinds of TV. Time for any TV, let alone the really horrible stuff, is rare once you have a parrot-like toddler hanging around. It could be humiliating if, for instance, your baby could name all of the characters from Sex and the City, but not the characters from Sesame Street. Especially if he chose to share that knowledge with your Mother-in-Law. Not that I know anyone this might have happened to.
4. Date Night—Of course, you should spend time with your Beloved. The marriage is the glue of the family. The children are happier when the parents are happy. Blah, blah, blah. We all know that once you have the baby, date night is something that falls into the category of wouldacouldashoulda. The convoluted arrangements alone to get out the door want to sap the joy out of it. But, oh the fun you will have, once you have closed that door behind you! A coffee, some dessert, and a slow stroll through the Barnes and Noble with your partner have never felt so wonderful.
5. Reading a book—Little people, big piles of dishes, medium stacks of bills, and huge mountains of laundry want to thwart you from sinking into that chair with your new read. But there is nothing like the pages of a great read to bring you back to you. Some of us have been known to spend a little more time in the bathroom to parse out a few more precious minutes to read.
6. Going to the Bathroom by Yourself—I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but kids never stop bugging you in there. Ever. While toddlers jabber at you the whole time you are taking care of business, older kids bound through the door looking for brushes, toothpaste, ANYTHING. Time alone in this sacred place is priceless.
7. Sleep— I could go on. But we all know it. It’s precious, it’s rare, it’s deeply pleasurable. It’s the number one item on our wish list.
8. Listening to OUR Music—Some of us do enjoy music outside the KidzBop, Raffi, Bieber, and Gomez genres, and some of it might even have an explicit warning on the label or lyrics that you don’t want to hear parroted back to you (makes you wonder why we get so excited about them learning to talk). Listening to what we like when we want at the volume we prefer—well, that’s the definition of guilty pleasure right there.
9. Personal Space—Is it too much to ask that your stuff stays where you put it? If you have one child, the answer is a simple yes. If you have more than one or, God forbid, a brood, you are doomed to a life of tracking down your personal belongings. The guiltiest pleasure of all would be finding your item where you left it.
10.Guilt-Free—In our BC lives (Before Children), we lived our lives as competent, happy, fun, well-rested people who made it through each day without a modicum of guilt. Oh, to get back to that feeling! To not wonder if we were doing this mothering job right! To not question if the choices we were making were going to lead to therapy or Attica! To have that crystal ball and see how this was all going to turn out! Being guilt-free is the ultimate guilty pleasure!
But if Motherhood changes everything (including our barometers for what constitutes pleasure), it also brings wonderful new experiences to our lives. If Dr. Seuss wrote a book about THIS phase of life it might be: “Oh, The Things You Will Learn, See, Do, and Be!!” The one thing you should NOT be is guilty for indulging in these pleasures.
With a teenager, I’ve (finally) grown out of some of these. But I still long to read a book. Or at least more than the page and a half I get through before I’m reading the backs of my eyelids and drooling on my pillow. Not a very fast way to get through a book!
Ally recently posted..Guilty Pleasures – Monday Listicles
Maybe it’s just my boys, but they have no concept of personal space. Oy! Erin
You nailed it ladies with this guilt bussiness. Why do we now feel it regarding everything? An how cme dads can poop in peace? I have never seen my kid bu daddy. It’s like a sacred code of something… Have a lovely vacation Ellen!
Stasha recently posted..Monday Listicles
Stasha, The mystery of why Dads are off the hook is the million dollar question—when we solve that, world peace will be a cake walk. Erin
I’m nodding to all of these. I haven’t had an interrupted conversation, let alone a lunch, in approaching 11 years now. I’m afraid I won’t know what to do, what to say or how to act when it finally happens again. The shock alone might kill me! Great list, I giggled my way from #1 to #10.
Delilah recently posted..Dinner for Dollars
Delilah, my husband and I have taken to escaping, er I mean, walking around the neighborhood every night for some uninterrupted time to talk. Loved your list too! Erin
per usual, love this. i’ve taught dane to lock and shut the bathroom door when i’m inside so i get all of thirty seconds alone before he realizes he’s locked out and the WAIL OF TERROR begins. 🙂 heaven.
Susan recently posted..A Scholarly Discourse on Office Supplies, Swamp People and Jensen Ackles
Love the Wail of terror!! Silly Dane! Mom is not going to live in there ( I have been told that is strictly verboten!). Erin
This is an awesome list, which shouldn’t surprise me as yours always are. And I love me some Dr. Seuss.
jacqui recently posted..Sharing The Magic…
Thanks! Dr. Seuss unites us all! Erin
yes. There’s always a “Mama” when I’m in the bathroom. And sleep and reading NEVER happen. At least at same time. Need to figure that out.
When you do, shoot us a line. We can say we knew you when. ; ) Erin
Reading item #2, “Going Out to Lunch with a Friend” made me smile! That was the highlight of my day last Wednesday.
Mine too. : ) Erin
I wonder if the guilt goes away once the children are grown…
Bridget recently posted..I Need A Sponsor
One of the moms farther along this path said it definitely lessens. We can dream, can’t we? Erin
Wise, thoughtful list. Like the dr. Suess use (yes I tried to make that rhyme). I know that I will forever cherish my naps.
Kimberly S. (Sperk*) recently posted..Five Minute Friday: Gift
That’s an awesome list. You totally got it all down… and yes, that last one… I don’t think it ever, ever goes away.
Susi recently posted..A loving, scolding mother
Sad, but true.
Have a wonderful time on the cruise, Ellen!
The one about lunch with a friend….I just got to do that today and it was wonderful! Made the rest of the day in meetings worth it! And I’m sorry to hear that privacy in the bathroom doesn’t get better when they’re teenagers. I had been hoping. :/
I don’t know why we don’t do the friend lunch more often—it makes everything better. Erin
Sigh alone bathroom time… I can’t remember what that is like. Oh wait I had it last week when my kid decided to venture to the backyard alone while I was in the shower…. awesome! And bad tv is just awesome…
Yay! Most people don’t know about my bad TV habit, because I read so much. I don’t try to keep it on the down low—they just don’t believe me. But bad TV is my favorite thing in the world with bad movies right up there too. Erin
Agreeing with all of these (okay maybe not the exercise, my only exercise is walking K to school!). Going to the bathroom by myself…I’d settle for just going to the bathroom without having the toddler actually sitting on my lap 🙂
Jennifer – Treading Water in the Kiddie Pool recently posted..Are We There Yet?
Yes to going out with a friend! I covet that time like nothing else.
I love BC – before children. I’m going to rip that off, but give you credit of course.:)
Great list!
heidi recently posted..resting place
Thanks!
And there I was feeling sad that I don’t have the babies yet. Maybe I should appreciate it while I can haha 🙂 I like peeing alone.
Pish Posh recently posted..E is for Exercise. Week 5: the Get Fit! Challenge
Ha!
Every. Single. One. Of these things is so true that I don’t even want to think about it! Especially that last one – heaven forbid you make a choice and then just go on with your life – after kids, you’re doomed to revisit everything you ever do and brood about it, from which school they go to, to what you gave them for dinner. Loved this post! 🙂
hollow tree ventures recently posted..Ding Dong the Tooth Fairy’s (Almost) Dead
Aww, thanks! Erin
I love this. Especially the personal space and going to the bathroom alone ones. I mean, seriously. How did the greatest joy of my life become getting to spend fifteen minutes in the bathroom without any interruptions? Oh well.
Janice recently posted..Saint in a Wheelchair
That’s one of those moments you know you are a mom! Erin