It was the worst of times. It was the best of times. It was the 80s.
Ellen: So what do you think of when you think 80s?
Erin: Besides BIG? Madonna clothes, lace gloves, legwarmers, big shoulder pads.
Ellen: You are 100% correct, buuuuuuuuuuuuut . . .
Erin: Seriously? You say I’m right, but then qualify it with a mile long but? I’m right. I lived through the 80s. I know. End of story.
Ellen: I think you’re looking through St. Elmo’s Fire colored glasses. I just feel like all of that stuff is the cute music video 80s. For example, my daughter had to make an 80s costume for a play she was in last year. Behold.
This is a little too adorable to be authentic.
Erin: She looks adorable — leg warmers, lace glove, jelly bracelets — everything I said. She even has a little Vans action thrown in.
Ellen: See, it’s that word “adorable” that’s getting me. Forget about the Benetton commercials and MTV. I’m talking about the REAL 80s — the 80s that walked down the halls of the middle schools and high schools. The 80s of which we BOTH have photographic evidence.
Erin: Well you’re going to have to gag on that spoon all by yourself because you know I still can’t scan pictures.
Ellen: Oh, if you are throwing down the fingerless lace glove gauntlet, then I am accepting the challenge because we owe it to the children to give an accurate history.
(Just to be clear – All Photographic Embarrassment Evidence is Ellen’s)
10 Righteous BIG Slices of the REAL 80s
1. Overview of an 80s Teenage Girl
That’s right, we had BFF before there was texting. Stick that on your skateboard and pump mongo. And speaking of not having texting, check out that extra long phone cord — necessary so you could roam free while talking to your BFFs. We’ll talk about the fashion later, but note that my room was About Last Night purple and green. And my love for Duran Duran was/is real, Folks. Today’s technology met yesterday’s fangirl when Duran Duran tweeted and Facebooked about my post. It was a dream come true that I didn’t even know was possible back in the day.
2. Real Righteous Everyday 80s Fashion
Loose mile long sleeves ending at your waistline is super flattering. We’re thinking of bringing it back.
Despite what the Disney Channel would have our kids believe, we did not walk around looking like we just jumped out of a Cyndi Lauper video . . . that was for special occasions. Mainly, we looked like we were drowning in our clothes. I had the best figure of my life and I was swallowed in Benetton and Esprit. Just look at my tiny friend above. We wore over-sized shirts, baggy pleated jeans, scrunched socks, huge bows in our hair, and over-sized blazers with linebacker shoulder pads. The only thing we tried to make small was the bottom of our jeans — those were folded, rolled and pegged. The rest of the pants were ballooning around us, but those leg openings were tight.
If you were serious, you put a safety pin in that cuff. Just to show it who was boss.
3. Totally Tubular Hair
This should probably not be its own category because it will be featured in EVERY picture, but I could not resist. Plus it gives a glimpse of the special occasion 80s. Check out those gloves! I never took them off for the entire dance. You know why? Because my hands were a blue stained Smurfy mess by the time I reached the dance. Wrapping your hands in synthetic satin makes them sweat. A lot.
That hair is big and that dress is something else — drop-waist, puffed sleeves, AND a big bow — but I’m just reminiscing about not having to wear Spanx. Which is a very good thing since it wasn’t invented and satin is not forgiving, People. — Ellen
Erin: You know, truly, that picture is not THAT bad.
Ellen: I’m easing them into it. Just wait.
4. Gnarly Accessories
Of note, this is a scan of an honest to goodness Polaroid picture — not some punk Pic Monkey frame. This post is dripping 80s. In a totally oozing way. — Ellen
It was really the accessories that made the outfits. Huge cross pendants (thanks Madonna), huge brooches, huge earrings — the 80s were B-I-G! Swatches, stacked rubber bracelets, fedoras, oh my! You could generally tell everything about a person from the buttons on their denim or Members Only jackets. I don’t think I can express enough that things were big and gaudy.
This picture was to show the buttons on my jacket. Unfortunately, most of them were on the right side, but you get the idea. I did promise the hair would get worse, so there’s that.
Erin: That hair just got real.
Ellen: Told you. Did they have straightening irons back then?
Erin: All evidence indicates no.
5. We Were All Valley Girls — Fer Shur
The 80s was all about teens adopting the ways of California. In particular we emulated Valley Girls — girls from the San Fernando Valley who spoke with atrocious grammar and diction, glorified shallowness and stupidity, and revered shopping as an art form. “Gag me with a spoon.” Our parents were so lucky. It really is beyond description. Let Moon Unit Zappa describe it to you in song. On Solid Gold no less.
6. When We Weren’t Valley Girls, We Were Skate Rats and Surfer Dudes
Check out my Jams. Just stop looking at my hair and glasses. I was a late bloomer. — Ellen
You would have thought we were all dividing our time between our surfboards and our skateboards — the Jams, the Vans, the lingo. Kate even reminded me I had a hunk of Sex Wax. I did not have a surfboard . . . or any other need for it. Now that we think about it, the 80s was like an elaborate, gaudy costume party. Except we were serious.
7. Where We Got Our Crazy Ideas
It can all be blamed on MTV born on August 1, 1981, at 12:01 a.m. At least that is our story and we’re sticking to it. See, there used to be a time when MTV had music videos . . . 24 hours a day. Our parents thought it would rot our minds. Little did they know what MTV would turn into in the 21st century. Give me a little Cyndi Lauper She Boppin’ over 16 and Pregnant any day. And yes, we know what Cyndi was getting at.
8. Well Maybe Movies Can Claim Part Of The Credit For Our Crazy Fads
It felt like movies started trends almost more than they reflected them. This was the decade where the “Coming of Age” movie ruled and John Hughes was king — The Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles, Weird Science, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, and Pretty In Pink. Don’t forget the Brat Pack either — Emilio Estevez, Rob Lowe, Andrew McCarthy, Demi Moore, Judd Nelson, Molly Ringwald, and Ally Sheedy. St. Elmo’s Fire showcased these powerhouses. And then there was The Karate Kid, Taps, Red Dawn, Dirty Dancing, Flashdance, Desperately Seeking Susan, Footloose, and Say Anything. We might be going out on a limb, but John Cusack was the 80s. But wait, so was Tom Cruise, Val Kilmer, Robert Downey Jr., Patrick Swayze, . . .
John Cusack in “Say Anything.” This would have lost so much of its punch with an iPod.
9. Totally Awesome 80s Music
We’ve already covered Ellen’s love for Duran Duran, but the 80s was pretty diverse. You had everything from pop to hair bands, from punk to techno, from acid rock to new wave. We had mixed tapes where Bon Jovi rubbed mullets with Twisted Sister while nestled next to the Dead Kennedys, The Rolling Stones, and U2. A Flock of Seagulls, The Thompson Twins, Madonna, Michael Jackson, and Blondie were also favorites. We can’t forget Rick Springfield and . . .
Ahhhhhh! We can’t list all of our favorites, so let’s talk about these mixed tapes. We could not just select songs for our playlists off of iTunes. We lived in a decade where you had to work for your music. You sat poised with a tape recorder next to the radio waiting for your jam to be played and hoping the DJ did not talk over the intro. If you were ambitious, you could go around to your friends’ houses to record their tapes and – gasp – vinyl records. The sound quality was scratchy, you could hear the recorder clicking on and off, and you didn’t really want the last five seconds of the songs anyway. If you loved static, you were in heaven.
Speaking of heaven, it was glorious when the Walkman came about and you could listen to your music on the go. The belt clip was INCLUDED. Maybe you should take notes Apple.
10. The Best Part Of The 80s
Forever friends. How grateful should our children be that we did not get forever stuck in the 80s?
Coming up on Our 25th High School Reunion
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Well, never having been up with fashion trends, I only pegged my pants and had somewhat high bangs. Oh and I had a walkman. That took 4, that’s right FOUR AA batteries! I never had a Swatch or a Benetton anything. Sigh. And I never liked Jams so I wasn’t sad not to own any.
My favorite line is that 80s were like an elaborate costume party.!! And somehow for me, it was like I was a spectator through the 80s. I recognize all of that stuff and remember it being around, but I have no idea what the heck I was wearing in those days!!
And dont’ get me started on how I know all the music from the 80s but never actually listened to it so I don’t know Duran Duran from Motley Crue from VanHalen. But then I’ll hear a song and be like “Oh, I never know that was THEM. I totally know this song!” Again, evidence that I was a spectator at the elaborate 10 year long costume party!
And if you stop by today, you’ll see I’m no better at following fashion today than I was 30 years ago!
sparkling74 recently posted..Put The Kids Away, It’s Gonna Get Hot In Here
Pegging the pants was THE most important part. And you are just proof that 80s music burrows it way into your soul. 🙂 Ellen
I may or may not have have a mullet or 4. Homemade jeans, bleached and ripped.
My 25th class reunion will be in the fall of ’13, too. weird, we’re the same age, must be the reason we click on the blogs.
good post, fer shur
Lance recently posted..Psychotic Reaction
I forgot about attacking my clothing with bleach!
BTW, you’ll like totally rock out your reunion. Us 80s kids have to stick together. Ellen
Your list is, like, tubular to the max! The bracelets! The buttons! The rolled up pants! The memories… And I had that Duran Duran poster, too! 🙂
Kim@Co-Pilot Mom recently posted..10 Things Totally 80s (Like, Totally)
I loved your list too! We are 80s sisters! Ellen
I’m trying to remember my age range in the 80s. Oh yes, I was in my early 30s or so. I was a runner so of course I had the latest Sony Walkman. That’s about all I can relate to. My older son, however, provided insight into the 80s world. Sometimes, however, this was not a good thing. LOL
Your list was great fun!
Terri Sonoda recently posted..Monday Listicles – Crushed
Ugh, I am also guilty of so many of the above crimes against fashion. Though I never had a chunk of Sex Wax, LOL!
Lisa C recently posted..Monday Listicles: 2012 in Tweets
Love, love, love this!!! I want to comment on every single one, but I’m on my iPad and my fingers would kill me, so 1. Extra long cord and Jams! Love it! I can’t believe Duran Druan tweeted and FB’d your DD post! Did you die?! I would have. 2. Pegged pants – my all-time fave 80s fashion simply bc of my short inseam. Pegged my pants until at least 94. 3. Dropped waist dresses! My homecoming dress had a dropped waist. I think I kept it for 15 years. I LOVED that’s dress! 6. Sex Wax – who knew you weren’t supposed to chew it? Apparently, I didn’t. Maybe they added that do not eat/chew part after the 80s. That’s the kind of thing where you’re thinking: they had to put this warning on here because some idiot thought it was food and tried to eat/chew it. I was THAT idiot! My claim to fame! MTV, John Cusack…sigh. Say Anything…best teen romance EVER! 9. Mix tapes – my husband is famous for his…at least on my blog…probably not so much with the ladies of the 80s though.
Loved this post! So much fun! So much reminiscing! Totally tubular!
Kate Hall recently posted..80’s Fashion Trends I Tried to Rock, But Mostly Didn’t
This was the best topic. I’m so glad you picked it! I had so much more stuff that I couldn’t fit in my list. Maybe we’ll do a Part 2 . . . Ellen
Why would anyone have used a straightening iron? That would have totally ruined the look of the perm.
Ginger Kay recently posted..True love and cold feet.
Because my curl is 100% natural, Baby. 😉 The straight locks you see on my head today are the result of much product and flat ironing. Ellen
You had the hair the rest of us envied!
Ginger Kay recently posted..Out with the old year, in with the dark haired man.
Oh yes, the huge earrings!! I remember that porcelain earrings were really popular then too. My sister won in the big hair stakes because she had more of it and it was naturally curly. I was always so jealous.
I completely forgot when I wrote my list that I had short hair and a rat tail in the 80s! Wish I had a photo of that! When’s the last time you saw that kind of thing?
Marie recently posted..Ten memories from the 80s
Unfortunately, I have seen a rat tail in the past year. Let’s all have a moment of silence for THAT. Ellen
One of my son’s roommates at college has one. Has. A current roommate.
Ginger Kay recently posted..Out with the old year, in with the dark haired man.
Brings back such fabulous memories though I NEVER liked MTV. i love all the pics you included…makes me wish I has access to mine. I never had REAL jams but my friends moms made me several pair…including some Muppet Baby ones…WTH was I thinking on that?
Robbie recently posted..Not Like Riding a Bike
Girl, I know we could have a duel of the big hair. 😉 And I am still giggling over Muppet Baby Jams. That. Is. Totally. Awesome. Ellen
The 80’s for me was dominated by music – Abba, Kylie Minogue, Jason Donovan and Rick Astley – my brother’s, not mine, as I was 5 in 1981 and 13 in 1989. I do remember dancing to Dancing Queen. I do remember my mother’s shoulder pads and large glasses.
The 80’s was rad and so were you ladies! Okay, except for the hair. 🙂
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I forgot about Kylie. Your 80s is my 70s. I remember my pair of bell bottoms that I loved and people serving Vienna sausage and peanuts at parties. The 70s were gross. Ellen
Jason Donovan was my first crush. Now I look at his recent pictures to feel good about my own aging 😉
Stasha recently posted..Monday Listicles
SWEET DUDE! The fact that you included pictures just makes this even more awesome! We had so much fun with this Listicle topic, because it was totally the coolest ever…like you guys in the ’80’s! 😉
thedoseofreality recently posted..Best of the 1980′s Fads
I was feeling nostalgic because I had just had lunch with my high school ladies. 🙂 Plus the pictures are funny. Totally. Ellen
THAT was a great list! So much fun.
I forgot about the over-sized t-shirts with the arms to the elbows. And the mixed tapes! We really had to work for those. It is a family favorite story about the one summer vacation trip to Canada, I was listening to my mixed tape when the DJ said something about snow in the forecast. I yelled, “snow!?” before I realized I must have made that tape in the winter and forgot to turn the tape off when the music ended. Our kids will never have such stories. Pity.
christine recently posted..Monday Listicles – Mullets and More
That is awesome. But seriously, they will never know. But they will have the texting transcripts to entertain themselves?? Ellen
John Cusack holding up a little iPod, lol–he never would have gotten the girl.
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Whatever happened to Ione Skye? 🙂 Ellen
Ok, this is why I couldn’t choose the 80s theme and went with boring old Tweets. Y’all just threw down the gauntlet, and I KNEW that with both of my adorable (slightly annoying) kids with me 24/7 for the next 9 days, I could never do this theme justice. You ladies. rock. My favorite line? “I had the best figure of my life and I was drowning in my Bennetton and Esprit.” Truth. xo
Stephanie @ Mommy, for real. recently posted..My Top Ten Tweets of Twenty-Twelve
This did take longer to put together than we thought, but once we were in it, we couldn’t stop. AND we could have gone on and on and on. 🙂 Ellen
Absolutely love this! And I’m old enough to totally get it 😉
Benetton shirts, buttons on jackets, extra-long phone cords – I have been there (sometimes I actually feel like I’m stuck there).
My daughter has been bringing the 80’s back with her clothes she wears VOLUNTARILY, including brightly-coloured skinny jeans. Like totally.
Kerstin @ Auer Life recently posted..2012 in tweets
What they are wearing today is still cuter than what I wore. My high school friends confirmed it when I showed them a pic of my daughter in floral jeans. 🙂 Ellen
Such an awesome list! And you know…I can’t believe Benetton stores are still around. Who shops there???
You’re so right about MTV. It was so much better back when they actually played music videos.
Bee recently posted..10 Things Totally 80s
I feel like I should go online and see what Benetton actually sells. Ellen
This is the best list ever! I love it, seriously you hit the 80’s nail on the head.
Bridget recently posted..Monday Listicles
Oh ladies!! You never fail to make me laugh. Had a Walkman like that, I got it for Christmas after dreaming au it for two years. And my husband bought one with his first salary. And still has it in the garage 😉
Stasha recently posted..Monday Listicles
You should save them for a museum, 🙂 Ellen
LOVED your list!!
I searched for a good pictures of pinning jeans BUT couldn’t find one. I guess because we called it pinning and you called it pegging. I may have to steal your picture for my blog, if I don’t have a chance to re-create my own.
If you watch Modern Family, have you seen the episode when Dylan does the Say Anything scene with his iPod? Hilarious. 🙂
You know, now that you mention it, I do remember that episode. Maybe it was buried in my brain. I knew it would look ridiculous. 🙂 Ellen
This is the best 80’s flashback I have seen yet!! From the room to the clothes to the buttons on the denim jacket – I had all that. And that blue dress? I wore THAT DRESS, the same color and everything, in a friend’s wedding in the late 80’s!!!! I SWEAR! I have picture proof that I have no intention of posting anywhere on the internet. And, uh, we still have sex wax on a shelf upstairs. *cough*
Ally recently posted..His 80’s List – Monday Listicles
I would LOVE to see a picture of that dress!! Come on! Why have a blog if you are not going to embarrass yourself?? Ellen
The 80’s were pretty gnarly! I am totally glad I am not stuck there, but I do occasionally torment my children by making them watch movies from that era. It’s totally worth it every time too!
Stacey recently posted..New Year’s Resolutions I will keep
Hush! Those movies are not torment! 🙂 Ellen
I had that same blue jean jacket with the buttons. I also had bangs that stood up straight! Love this trip down memory lane.
deana recently posted..My resolution for you
I think standing up straight was better than the big puff. (Grass is always greener on the other side.) Ellen
“This is a little too adorable to be authentic.” EXACTLY!! Like you said, we have our own photo albums to remind us what we actually looked like, and it wasn’t pretty. Well, at least not for me.
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We’re here to keep it real. 😉
The OP shorts! I use to steal my sisters all the time. Tight rolling still makes me laugh. This brought back some great memories! I wasn’t into my teens yet when the 80’s rolled in but my sister was. Fun times!
Ducky recently posted..A Peek At The Duck Twat
Too funny! There is NO WAY I’d have posted any pictures from the 80’s… or 90’s for that matter!
Thanks for the memories… and laughs.
Julia
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Oh those pictures TOTALLY remind me of my glory 80’s days too!! You are both hilarious and courageous to post them!!! Oh Lord, I would just DIE if anyone saw me with my BIG hair up to the sky fried by Sun In and perms… the BIGGEST earrings ever draping my shoulders (feathers and loops cause I had about 13 holes in my ears…leg warmers and flashdance sweatshirts off my shoulder and of course the leggings ripped up with a nice mini skirt to boot! Converse gym shoes- hot pink. You get the picture. Oh how I thought I was the COOLEST valley girl EVER!!! 😉 Where is my lip smacker? I HAVE to have my lip smackers!!!
Chris Carter recently posted..New Year Resolution 2013
I like to think the photos show how far I have come. 🙂 Ellen
Those pictures are amazing! And truly capture the essence of the 80’s!
Audrey recently posted..Christmas 2012
Loved that post – it was as if this topic had been chosen just for you. And thanks for the photographic evidence 😉
Anja recently posted..Cocalores in 2012 – The 10 Best Posts
This post rocks. I agree with you on all counts. And the big benetton shirt on the petite chic…………..I remember that shirt because we shared it! I think it was mine! Ha. Another great element of the 80’s……..we would share our new threads……at least we did. It expanded our wardrobe of bigness. 🙂
And, lastly, the best movies were in the 80’s. John Cusack rocks and still does.
Thanks for reading this Danielle! You were definitely there. We swapped clothes All. The. Time. Weirdly, girls don’t really seem to do that any more. Maybe they all just have too much. Ellen
I love blog posts on the 80’s. It’s like going back in time and feeling the same feelings again.
Debbie McCormick recently posted..For granted
I had Sex Wax too! My only defense was I lived in Florida (inland, many miles from the beach, rarely went and NEVER surfed).
Oh, good times, good times.
Cyndy recently posted..Warm & Fuzzy Fragments
I did live about 45 minutes from the beach, so that’s my cover? Ellen
LOVE these photos! Such memories!
And those satin gloves SLAY me!!!
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