The Lazy Girls’ Guide to a Kicking Super Bowl Party

Super Bowl Sunday is just days away! The American holiday to end all holidays! Okay, maybe that is taking it a bit far, but we are very excited that the Baltimore Ravens are in it this year.We are native Marylanders, you know.

Erin: My family is all in!

Ellen: We are happy for the Ravens, too, but I feel like I have to present that with an asterisk. My family is truly fans of the Philadelphia Eagles.

See once upon a time there was a little boy named Frank (my husband) who use to go with his father to see the Baltimore Colts play in Memorial Stadium. But then in 1984, a mean old man named Irsay moved the Colts to Indianapolis in the middle of the night. When a love that great is ripped away, it leaves a void. Luckily, the Eagles were just an hour away to fill the hole in his heart.

Erin: That is my story too! We stopped watching football altogether when they left town, because even that void would not make my family Redskins fans.

Ellen: Well, duh.

Erin: My family embraced the Ravens with open arms when they came to town and never looked back. There are  plastic geese bedecked in Ravens jerseys at my aunt’s house.

Ellen: You just can’t abandon your alliances at the drop of a hat. We like the Ravens, and Coco (14) is a true fan. We’re fine with it because it is a home team. It is not good fan etiquette to just “pick” a team from anywhere in the country and jump on their bandwagon. And for the love of Don’t-Break-A-Nail, you CANNOT pick a team based on their uniforms or mascot.

Erin: I’ll trust you on these rules Miss Manners of the Pigskin since I found out at the Mother/Daughter tea that you can talk some serious football. Plus other people agree with you. My  beloved crush Frank Deford wrote a rocking’ piece about why it’s good to root, root, root for the home team!

Ellen: Our Sisterhood is versatile, right?

Erin:  I read Sports Illustrated. I’m in the know, but my football knowledge is more about the players’ backgrounds and their roads to victory.

Ellen: Nothing wrong with looking at the color commentary side of things . . . as long as you’re not picking teams because their uniforms match the blue of your eyes.

Erin: Now, while  we are very excited about the Super Bowl, it is not the only thing going on in our lives. Let’s get a grip.

Ellen: Shoot, I’ll be at a volleyball tournament until 3 o’clock.

Erin: So we don’t have time to be fussy with our Super Bowl spreads, but we may have enough pride that we can’t just throw out a pizza and a bag of chips.

Ellen: If like us, you haven’t thought about your party until two days before, here is the solution.

 


Erin: Lazy doesn’t really seem fair. I would call it smart. It’s smart to do things the easy way.

Ellen: Whatever, you’re the one who put the word “lazy” in your dip title.

 

So first the APPETIZERS  . . .

Lazy Girl’s Black Bean Cream Cheese Dip

You know what? Be a hero and make a double batch from the start.

This dip has four ingredients: cream cheese, black beans, salsa, and shredded cheese. The most involved step is draining the black beans. We have found it ups the appeal to use gourmet salsa, but really that’s like saying the red convertible made the Homecoming Queen even more popular. This dip is always the first to go. Just make sure you buy enough tortilla chips because people have been known to clean the dish out with a spoon. Or their tongue. And no one wants to see that.

Full printable recipe

 

Ellen’s Buffalo Chicken Dip

I make this all of the time, but there is still no picture because it goes too quickly! The secret to the scrumptious-ness of this dip is cooking the chicken in the crock pot the day before or earlier in the day. You MUST cook the chicken this way to get raves; if you just use plain shredded chicken, I can’t be responsible for the yawns you will incite.

And now the recipe is even better. I use to recommend a baking step, but that step has been punted. Now, I do EVERY step in the crock pot. Maybe “lazy” should be in the title of this recipe, too.

Full printable recipe

 

On to the MAIN COURSE . . .

Alright, so everyone is wowed by the appetizers. Time to kick the laziness up a notch.

Erin: Still lobbying to switch from “lazy” to “smart.”

Ellen: Oy! Well, since this is a new “recipe” we’re sharing, I’ll humor you.

The Smartest Crock Pot Pulled Pork

Lazy or smart? Potato, Pu-tah-toe.

There will be no printable recipe , because you’re a smartie and we believe in you.

Three ingredients: 5 – 8 pound pork tenderloin, package of dry onion soup mix, and one 16.9 oz bottle of Coke.

Throw it in the crock pot and let cook for at least 7 hours. Shred the meat with a fork.

You can do it!

Ellen: Alright, we may be lazy, but we can’t throw health completely to the wind. Gotta have some veggies.

Erin:  See! That’s smart!! Seriously, we should drop the lazy.

Ellen: How about we call this recipe “Switzerland” and just go with the title it already has?

 

Crispy Colorful Vinaigrette Coleslaw

Best Cole Slaw EVER!

This cole slaw is the best, because it doesn’t have a drippy, creamy dressing. It perfectly tops the pulled pork on a bun or takes the heat away from the Buffalo Chicken Dip. The recipe calls for some chopping of vegetables, but if you want a lazier smarter version, you can just dump a bag of shredded cabbage, a bag of broccoli slaw, and a bag of shredded carrots in the bowl and call it a day.

Full printable recipe

 

Can’t forget about DESSERT . . .

Oreo and Peanut Butter Brownie Bites

Oreo and Peanut Butter Brownie BitesYou can whip these up in minutes to be declared the MVP of all time of all Super Bowl parties. Yes, they are that good. Brownie mix, Oreos, and peanut butter: three ingredients that make your taste buds go boom!

Full printable recipe

 

But finally, here is the piece de resistance (the Super Bowl is in New Orleans after all) . . .

Your very own ballot to up the fun! This thing gives you the opportunity to vote on all things football from who wins the coin toss to the COMMERCIALS! This is one of our favorite things ever! We are shaking our virtual pom-pons. Rah-Rah-Rah!

Print the PDF Super_Bowl_2013

May the odds always be in your favor.

Ellen and Erin

 

 

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