Monthly Archives: August 2014

How To Get Conversations With Your Kids Rolling

We talk about talking with your kids a lot. You can read about it here and here.

But how, oh how, do you make it easier?

Try a little something we like to call “Stop, Drop, and Roll with it.” Stop the lectures. Drop the awkward broaching of even awkward-er topics. Roll with the conversation.

It’s all about building a “Culture for Conversation” with your kids. Every conversation does not have to be complex and deep to build a connection. Every shared giggle, every act of listening, every story told builds an environment, a culture, in your home conducive to conversation.

It’s all about sharing your real self with your real kids in a real way. So here’s a little how-to so you can get those conversations with your kids rolling today.

Elementary

In this age group, parents tend to drive the conversation, but kids are a receptive, captive audience. They still see you as a fountain of knowledge and a go-to for information. You are forming the habits now that will serve you later in the tween and teen years.

Erin’s family has a cube with table topics that they like to bring out at mealtime.

Create mealtimes and bedtimes with space for conversation. Establish the routine of conversing every day.

Use experiences with TV, movies, and music to kindle conversation. Homework can also be a great jumping off point.

Erin: While studying for a social studies test with my then third-grader, I asked him this question: “Name three ways the Native Americans use their natural resources.” This was his inspired response: “Well, very well, and outstanding.” In this case, we were able to talk about his possible future in stand-up. Don Rickles has nothing on this kid.

Purchase a conversation starter like TABLETOPICS Family: Questions to Start Great Conversations

Erin: We love this resource. It brings us gems like this: At dinner last night, we asked the question: So what makes you different from everyone else?

Son 1: I’m handsome.
Son 2: I have great hair.
Son 3: I am the funniest and cutest.

Apparently, humility is NOT the thing that distinguishes Dymowskis from the pack.

Sometimes conversation thuds, but learn to keep going and only laugh out loud if you can’t help it.

Erin: This is really, really hard to do sometimes, especially when your kids lob up keepers like this:

Son: Dad, that team we just beat is the same one we lost to in the first game of the season.

My husband: That’s great. What do you think was the difference?

Son: The score.

Middle School

This is the moment where the parenting dynamic shifts. You have to remember (over and over again) conversation is just as much about listening. At the very least, Middle Schoolers have many more opinions about what is going on in the world around them. At the very worst, they share them with you. We jest. Kind of.

How to get the converstion rolling with your kids. -Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

The best thing that you can do is to switch it up a little. Let them lead the conversation now. While they may no longer think of you as the Bomb Diggity of Wisdom, you’re still a major influencer in their lives. In fact, you are still the most important one. They want to have conversations with you. They just want more of a role determining where, when, and how.

With older kids, it’s less about creating a conversational agenda and more about grabbing a moment and going with it.

Erin: When my oldest was in 6th grade, I decided to use the time in the car to get at the heart of a matter bothering me. Not a bad idea in itself, but I was so set on attacking my agenda that I started pelting him with questions right out of a parenting book the second he got in the car. He knew I wasn’t being authentic and he called me on it. He rolled down the window and yelled out, “My mom is trying to relate to me.”

Catch them in the first 15 minutes when they walk through the door. They are ready to unload, but if you don’t catch it, they are stingy with the replay button.

Listen without judgment or reaction. Just use “Yes, I am listening cues” like nodding your head. We love Michelle Icard’s use of the term “botox brow.” Learn it, love it, employ it often.

In general, only give the info they are looking for, BUT always be on the lookout for segueing into trickier topics like underage drinking.

This is a great time to set conversational guidelines. We are talking about things like: no name-calling, no bringing up old business, no using words like “always” and “never”. This is the time to start modelling healthy relationship tools. At the very least, you are creating awesome future spouses. Imagine the thank you notes your future sons and daughters-in-law will send you.

Emphasize that disagreements arise between all people, even those who love each other. Families work to resolve conflict with open minds, open hearts, and open dialogue.

Oh, and learn their lingo. If you were visiting a foreign country, you would take a guidebook and learn the customs. The natives will appreciate the effort . . . usually.

High School

It’s similar to middle school, but teens spend more time away from families than with them. Between school, sports, activities, jobs, and friends, they have their own world. Honoring that they have their own life experiences and independent knowledge is key to maintaining a good open relationship.

Honor that they have been exposed to things that you didn’t expose them to. Ask about movies they have seen, music they listen to, art they like, and books they love. They may talk a little or a lot, but these are your breadcrumbs back to them when the talking gets harder.

Remind them that they have a soft place to land. Your words, gestures, and even your familiar home environment should send a message that your house is their safe place. If they ask you not to tell something to your mother, your best friend, or their siblings, honor that. Husbands are a whole other ballgame, but the point is that they need to know that you are the Fort Knox of trust.

Keep it conversational rather than confrontational. Eye contact can be great, but shouldn’t be mandatory. Some things are just hard to talk about. The car is a great place for this to happen . . . especially in the first fifteen minutes they descend upon you. We are often grateful to have two hands on a steering wheel and a windshield to stare through when the kids start dropping bombshells.

Erin: In my house, we have a loveseat that brings you together but makes eye contact impossible without awkward neck angles. It’s the perfect chair for talking. My kids will even ask to “take it the chair” sometimes.

Walking together and doing activities gets the conversation flowing.

Ellen: I have to remind myself of this constantly. I once asked my daughter to go on a hike and I learned more in that twenty minutes than a month’s worth of “How was your day?” I was longing for a flip chart though because the social hierarchy and nuisances she shared were more complicated than the lineage of the House of Windsor.

Be prepared for conversational shrapnel. Good conversation with teens means that you are sometimes going to get nailed with things you really didn’t want to know. You are likely to find out that sweet little kid who slept over at your house for five years straight is now a social media bully or worse. Just remember that “botox brow” we mentioned before or you are going be shut out faster than you can say, “Come again?”

Were you hoping for more of a step-by-step instead of an Ikea pamphlet? Here’s the thing, you’ve got this. No one knows or loves your kids better than you. Just remember to always put on your listening ears (and face) and you’ll be fine.

If you’re looking for more resources for a lifetime of conversations, the Foundation for Advancing Alcohol Responsibility has them. You can find all sorts of great ideas for starting and continuing talks with your kids. Check out this video from FAAR too. It’s a great place to start!

Good luck and just keep talking!

Erin and Ellen

This is a sponsored post but the lessons learned and the “shake your head” anecdotes are all ours. We really do endorse this as one of the many valuable resources available to guide you through the process of talking to your kids.

Want to get conversations rolling with your kids? Check out our How-To.

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The “Ignore No More” Phone App: Perfection or Helicopter Parenting?

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Recently, we posted this on our Sisterhood Facebook page:

A mom created an app called “Ignore No More”. It is exactly what it sounds like. Your kid ignores your text? You lock down their phone until they respond. It generated a nice little conversation on our page with many “Heck yeahs” and “Perfects,” but we were unprepared for the reaction when we brought it up with our real live family.

Actually, we didn’t even bring it up with them directly. Our teen daughters overheard us talking about how the topic was pumping some life into our Facebook page.

They can’t hear us when we tell them to pick up their socks, but they heard us talking about this ten feet away as they were about to jump in the pool. In a word, the response was visceral.

Their heads snapped around and their outrage crackled the air at the mere mention of the words “phone” and “shutdown” in the same sentence.

It looked kinda like this:

This was all kinds of bizarro out of balance to us. At first glance, this app seemed well within the limits of parenting in a digital age. Because seriously, “Limits, boundaries, limits, boundaries,” is the modern media mom’s mantra, right?

After a double-take and a “Calm your giblets,” we threw this out there: “So what’s with the Mount Vesuvius of reactions? If you just answer your phones, this doesn’t affect you at all. No. Big. Deal.”

In all honesty, they were all so worked up in the beginning that they couldn’t really put a finger on exactly what the trigger was. Then after they calmed down a bit, their ideas started to take some shape:

“It would cut us off from everything.”

“It is such a violation.”

“But it’s just so wrong.”

But once again, “Kids, if you are copacetic with the mom-kid agreement to just answer our texts, it doesn’t really affect you. Like at all. Ever.”

That just stirred the outrage up to boiling again.

We took this moment to remind them about our overriding phone ground rule. “The phone belongs to us and you have it for our pleasure and convenience . . . like when we need you to take a video of us for a blog post. But seriously,we don’t mind you enjoying Instagram, but you only have the phone for safety purposes and so we can tell you who we found to pick you and your stinky cleats up from soccer.”

So we asked the question: “Why did you react SO viscerally? What is this really about?”

Again, there was a bit of an uproar, but as the emotional responses waned, their logical centers took over and they gave us this:

“It’s a violation of my privacy.”

“It feels like you’re being a control freak.”

“It’s all about trust.”

Oh.

Erin: And I started to see their point of view.The subtle messages we send to our kids are just as important as the overt lessons. With a second glance, we had to concede that they might be on to something.

Ellen: I have to admit when I posted about the app I thought, “This is a great idea,” and I wanted to see what our readers thought. Their responses were overwhelmingly favorable, just like mine.

Erin: But when I really thought about it, given our daughters’ reactions, this app really started to look like helicopter parenting in the extreme. The app’s point seemed to be, “I need you now. You will be available to me now. Oh, you’re not? Well, I can control that.” Yep. Looks a little like hovering in the extreme. Can you hear the thwack thwack of the rotors overhead?

Ellen: Now our kids were really calming down because they could see understanding dawning in our eyes. The more I thought about it, the more I realized I would never use this as anything other than a punishment. I set my expectations with my kids that their phone is for my convenience, but I also respect them enough to only text about the important things like, “You need to get in Mr. Brian’s car after band or you’ll have a long walk home.”

I’m not reminding them to turn in their papers or asking them to check in during their school day or bugging them to eat their sandwich before the cupcake. I am communicating, not helicoptering. Okay, sometimes I type out an “I love you,” or a “Good luck,” because a text is the teen version of a lunchbox note, but that is still not hovering and no response is required.

Erin: Our girls sprawled on the pool lounges with relief when we concluded this app would only be a tool for us to discipline a child without taking away the safety of having a phone.

Ellen: We all agreed, there would be many discussions and a hefty grounding going on before this app was installed.

So NOW what do YOU think?

Is this app a good idea or helicopter parenting at its worst?

What phone rules do you have for your children?

We would love to hear from you,

Erin and Ellen

This app made our teens go berzerk. What do you think: Is this perfection or helicopter parenting?

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Hold Onto Summer Book List

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Pumpkins may be pushing pool noodles from the shelves, but there is still summer to be had! The sun is still blazing, our legs are still sticking to the car seats, and more importantly, there are still some great beach reads to be devoured.

Now when we say “Beach Reads” we are not talking about bare chested studs astride white stallions. We’re talking about novels that are easy to get lost in—the ones that leave you wanting the next page and sad when they are over. They are easy, enjoyable reads with interesting stories and rich character development.

Actually, they’re just good, solid books perfect for any time, but why not use a last hurrah to summer as the perfect excuse to load up your Kindle or pile up your nightstand?

A Hundred Summers by Beatriz Williams

While the intrigue may not be so deep that you are profoundly shocked, this sweeping saga still pulls you through the pages and leaves you deliciously wondering from time to time. But the real charm of this novel lies in its richly sculpted characters and relationships. Williams examines class standing, prejudice, and the complicated nature of female relationships in a truly satisfying way. Set in the socialite scene of the 1930s, this novel is as glamorous as it is gritty as it plunges into the treachery of family secrets and true love.

The Next Best Thing by Jennifer Weiner

This is the perfect Hollywood success story with the gilt of perfection delightfully rubbed bare in a number of places. You’ll love the quirky main character, Ruthie, the screenwriter with the tragic back story, whose real heart and soul inspire you to cheer for her from the very first page. How can you not love a character whose grandmother will follow her across the country to help her realize her dream? This book has it all–love, betrayal, and a delightful comeuppance. This peek behind the Hollywood curtain will have you missing 30 Rock a little less.

Beautiful Day by Elin Hildebrand

This is the story of planning a wedding day, a real wedding day rife with disasters, not the stuff of princess dreams. Money is no object, so everything should be falling into place, but everything is actually starting to unravel. At the heart of the story is The Notebook, the instruction manual the bride-to-be’s mother wrote for her before she died. This tale is at times wistful and sometimes heartbreaking, but it is written with a light touch and is always entertaining. At first it seems like each character has his or her own side story going on, but it soon becomes apparent that each tale is part of the messy tapestry woven when two families join through marriage. It is the multiple points of view that make this novel as tasty as a slice of wedding cake.

Defending Jacob by William Landay

This book was so popular among Erin’s family and friends LAST summer that it took us a year to track it down.

Totally worth the wait.

A legal thriller that would feel right at home next to your favorite Grishams and Turows, this one will keep you guessing and turning pages until the end. Landay may delve into some of the fears and insecurities of modern parenting and he may write very believable, relatable characters, but ultimately you will devour this one because it’s a good old-fashioned whodunit and that’s always a good read.

Big Little Lies by Liane Moriarty

Who’s looking for some book crack?

We found it!

Erin laughed, cried, and ignored her kids for three days to finish this one in the big, sloppy gulps it demands. You know from the beginning that there has been a terrible tragedy at the local school’s Trivia Night, because Moriarty leaves little crumbs at the end of each chapter. But that’s not the story here. This is NOT another legal thriller.

A big, sprawling character study of modern moms, it may be. An ironic, funny take on modern parenting, it definitely is! It’s also a rollicking good time. You’ll laugh and cringe at just how right Moriarty gets all the characters hanging out in the school parking lot. A great read to get you ready for back-to-school while still soaking up that last joyful moment of summer indulgence.

Enjoy this summer book list and your last few days of summer!

Erin and Ellen

Don’t let summer go before you check out these great beach reads! The Hold Onto Summer Booklist

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5 Things All Teen Girls Need

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It’s back-to-school and we’re gathering all of the necessary supplies for a great year. It’s so much work to fill those carts, and really painful to empty those wallets, but that’s not where the prep ends.

With the start of school, calendars explode with activity and what’s important to the core of our girls’ lives can get lost in zooming from Point A to Point B while not forgetting to check off Item C and drop off Project D. Some of the most important things they’ll need for success aren’t things we can buy, but things we need to make room for in our lives and in theirs.

5 Things All Teen Girls Need

1. A Soft Place to Land

Middle school and high school can be rough to navigate–inhospitable even. Girl World especially has a complicated landscape where petty jealousies and miscommunications can wreak havoc and become all consuming.

Girls need to know that home is their safe place. Continuing rituals from their childhood that provide time to talk–like a regular mealtime or bedtime routine–means that girls know they already have a time scheduled for your attention and help. You are no longer reading them bedtime stories, but it’s reassuring for them to know they have time to tell their stories to you.

2. Time to Just Be

Girls love downtime. The mind and heart are wired for connections and these are born in the spaces in between band and volleyball practice and helping to decorate the gym for the Homecoming Dance. Acknowledging their inherent need for moments to relax and recharge will go miles towards helping them be their best, most authentic selves. Every minute is precious, but not every minute needs to be scheduled.

3. Our Two Cents

We know the value of keeping our mouths shut. A lot of peace can be had in the Kingdom of Teens when we don’t comment or even raise an eyebrow at every little thing, but there are bigger issues where we need to model how to form an opinion or take a stand.

Strong women don’t hang out in the middle of the road, but steer their own course. Telling them how we feel about big events and small happenings lets them know us better and gets their minds working to help them learn about themselves.

4. Adventure

They sometimes groan and grumble when we show up with a paddle or a walking stick ready to take them on a trail or river, but once they are out there, they are just fine. Exercise and fresh air does wonders to clear the mind and boost self-esteem. Nothing provides a sense of accomplishment like jumping off that ledge, paddling against that current, or finding your way back from that trail.

5. Opportunities to Grow

Whether they are musical or artistic or athletic or academic, girls need a chance to try on different hats. Here’s the secret: Throw out the “or.” They don’t need to pick just one persona from the list or stick with that one choice forever. They need chances to see themselves differently and imagine different futures for themselves. They need the encouragement to try new things, embrace mistakes, and reject limiting labels.

To that end, we highly recommend the organization Girl Talk and its LeaderU Summit. Dedicated to helping girls develop leadership skills, Girl Talk is a a peer-to-peer mentoring program for high school and middle school girls. Founded by Haley Kilpatrick, Girl Talk wants to help teens build self-esteem, expand their leadership skills, and foster a heart for community service.

Our daughters were fortunate to be sent to the Summit by FAAR, The Foundation for Advancing Alcohol Responsibility. You can read what our girls wrote about their experience here. This probably goes without saying, but we’re pretty proud of their published work. All opinions expressed here and there are all our own and their own.

Money can’t buy these 5 Things All Teen Girls Need.

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Our Dirty Little Back To School Secret

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We have a dirty little secret . . .

Come a little closer . . .

Closer . . .

WE HATE THAT OUR KIDS ARE GOING BACK TO SCHOOL!

Erin: Whoa, I just felt pitchforks clanking and hackles raising through the WiFi waves!

Ellen: Don’t kick us off of the island! We honor your fist bumping and heel clicking, really we do. Those of you whooping it up, may we quote that great philosopher, Garth of Wayne’s World fame, and say, “Party on!”

Erin: Yes. What it really boils down to is we are a little selfish. The stone cold truth is that summer is our time to just be. No lunches to pack, no carpools to drive, no sports teams to tolerate, and no calendars to check . . .

Ellen: And re-check and then check again and then still mess things up. Dammit.

Erin: It means that we have time with our kids . . .

Ellen: Who we adore so much it hurts.

Erin: But we also have time for us. Books that sit all year on that bedside table finally get read when the only thing on the agenda is dipping our toes in the pool or hanging out on the dock.

Ellen: Oh, aren’t you sounding so erudite. Um, a good chunk of our time was spent goofing around like this:

Our Dirty Little Back to School Secret - Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

Erin flipped the script and finally got her revenge on Ellen for her (more than occasional) crabbiness.

And swinging around like this:

Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms: Our Dirty Little Back To School Secret. Does it involve swinging? Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't.

Okay now. This is the only “swinging” that takes place in The Sisterhood. Geez.

And fangirling like this:

Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms - Our Dirty Little Back To School Secret: Let's go crazy, crazy, crazy!

One Direction 4EVER! What? Cougars love 1D too.

Erin: It’s just that summer gives me time to really remember myself–not Queen-of-the-Crockpot Erin, not Homework-Task-Master-Erin, not Supreme Champion of Scheduling Erin, just Erin. Summer means time lost in pages of favorite books or spent paddling into sunsets on favorite waters or playing lazy long games. It’s exploring favorite trails and visiting special friends . . .

Ellen: Wait, whose summer are we talking about? When did you have all this time?

Erin: What!? I read. I paddled. I played.

Ellen: Yes, but the picture you’re painting makes me envision you sitting on a porch swing while a ceiling fan lazily turns above you, cooling you just enough. I picture you sipping lemonade as a single drop of condensation slides down the side of your crystal goblet. Oh, and there is a rainbow, definitely a rainbow. With a unicorn. And no bugs. Oh, and what else is absent from this picture? Let’s see. Oh, no kids asking you questions every 15 seconds.

Every time I have talked to you on the phone or been in your presence you have been shushing kids and saying, “JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE!!”

Erin: Weeellllll, summer does also mean a houseful. Not all of the kids I’m shooing away are even mine. It’s like a clown car when I slide back the minivan doors at the community pool. The lifeguard must think I have ten kids.

Ellen: And nothing adds to a mom’s feelings of peace and tranquility like a visit to a community pool.

Erin: Okay, the chaos is still there, but at least I don’t have to get kids to two different schools, make sure everyone has their homework done, and keep my lesson plans on track. The buzzing around me does increase by about twenty-fold, but there is just more space in my head.

Ellen: Okay. THAT I can accept. You were starting to sound like a crazy person.

Erin: <sigh> Maybe it really is time to go back to school.

Ellen: Now I feel like I was too hard on you. We will really miss the fun times with our kids. There was a huge chunk that was pretty darn Instagram-worthy. Like this:

And this:

Ellen: We sure did a lot of jumping.

Erin: On that note, it really is time for us to “jump” back into school again too. Dirty little secret or no, the moment has come to exchange the boogie boards for the backpacks whether we like it or not.

Ellen: Well, I’m trading in my “jumping” for kicking and screaming. I don’t wanna start the routine again. Okay, maybe, I’ll just quietly kick and whine in my head. Being a good example for the kids and all of that nonsense.

Erin: We really have to go back to school. Right?

Ellen: <sigh> We really do.

Clicking your heels for joy at back-to-school? We have a dirty little secret.

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How Do You Make a Giveaway Great? Put A Little Boogie In It.

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In celebration of Great Grape Boogie Wipes being sold at Walmart, we’re teaming up with Boogie Wipes to offer the Great Grape Summer Giveaway!

We understand that if you have been hanging around here for a while, you might be scratching your head thinking, “Aren’t Erin’s and Ellen’s kids a little old for the Boogie Wipe demographic? Surely the nose picking days are behind them.”

And if you’re classmates with any of Erin’s and Ellen’s kids, you might be rubbing your hands together in cartoon villain glee wondering if we are possibly going to reveal a nasal excavator extraordinaire. You might even be searching your memory banks for your favorite nose picking euphemisms, just to ambush them on the first day of school. Here, let us help you.

How about:

Digging for gold
Exploring the bat cave
Picking a winner
Rhinotillexomania (Sorry, Ellen couldn’t help herself.)

We hate to burst your mucus bubble, but Boogie Wipes are for everyone! In fact, in The Sisterhood, Ellen is the major user of these magnificent, grape-y wipes. Seriously. Over a year ago she had her nasal septum repaired and Boogie Wipes came to the rescue to relieve the crusties and the congestion.

Now that we are considering it, Ellen’s kids may not be thrilled with her talking about her nose either. But our point is Boogie Wipes are perfect for noses of all ages!

So put a little Boogie in that cart and without further ado enter this giveaway to put some cash in your wallet.

It's a Great Grape Summer celebration! Enter to Win a $50 Walmart gift card and a Boogie Wipes prize pack. One winner each week for the next 8 weeks. Enter now!

One winner will be drawn each week for the next eight weeks and will receive a $50 Walmart gift card and a Boogie Wipes prize pack.

How to Enter

From following some of our favorite bloggers on social media to instagramming a picture of your Great Grape purchase at Walmart, there are dozens of ways to enter – and a few ways to enter every single day.

Check back throughout the next eight weeks to enter again and see if you won!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Want to have more fun this summer?

Visit the Boogie Wipes blog for all sorts of summer fun ideas – including Sidewalk Chalk Recipes, Crafts and Games to Play with Pool Noodles and DIY Board Games (for when it rains).

Good luck!

Giveaway is live Tuesday, July 8, 2014 until midnight on Tuesday, September 2, 2014. US and Canada residents only. One winner will be chosen each week and will be notified via email. Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms received no compensation for sponsoring this event, and is not responsible for the delivery of the prize. Prize delivery is the sole responsibility of Boogie Wipes.

Save your nose and your wallet with Boogie Wipes! #giveaway

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Best Turkey Burger Recipe Ever!

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Vacationing with family is the best. Not only are you making great family memories like these:

You also are privy to how the other half of the family lives. You get new obsessions (thanks Aunt Karen for the non-stop Settlers of Catan marathons!), but you also get great new recipes.

Everyone knows that summer is the perfect time for burgers. We are girls who love a good burger, but we also like to fit into the bathing suits we bought at the beginning of the season by the end of it. Special thanks to Erin’s brother-in-law Dan for cooking up a special turkey burger recipe that is the perfect combination of delicious and good-for-our-“bottom”-lines. It’s easy and inexpensive too.

Ingredients:

One pound lean ground turkey
4-6 white/cremini mushrooms (you can be creative here and use your favorite but you will need about 3 ounces) *diced very very fine
1/2 small white, yellow or red onion *diced very, very fine
2 Tablespoons Montreal Steak Seasoning
2 Tablespoons Worcestershire Sauce

Steps:

1. Dice the mushrooms very, very fine.

2. Dice the onions very, very fine. You can go so far as to mince the onion but don’t try to mince mushrooms. They get weird and pasty if you do that.

If you haven’t guessed, the dicing is the key to this recipe. You really want to infuse the flavor of the onion and the mushroom without making them take center stage. Their job here is mainly to help moisten the turkey burger AND give it full fat flavor and texture without the full fat of regular beef.

If you are confused about the difference between mincing and dicing, mincing makes less uniform, smaller, more irregularly shaped pieces while dicing produces more uniform little cubes between 1/8 and 1/4 inch. Need a visual? Check out the great picture on this site.

3. Mix all of the ingredients together in a bowl with your hands.

4. Pat into 4 patties. Unlike beef, you don’t need to worry about over-handling because of all of the good stuff you added to the mix. Mix, pat, and you are good to go.

5. Cook over medium high heat, 4-5 minutes per side, until thoroughly cooked through. These are really great fried up in a cast-iron skillet, so if you have one of those, give that cooking method a try.

These are so delicious they are worth every second dicing and mincing. Enjoy!

Tastiest Turkey Burger #recipe Chock full of flavor

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7 Reasons to Tell Your Kids to Take a Hike

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This is the point of summer break where the natives start getting restless. Vacation has come and gone, tidy craft corners have fallen into disarray, and summer bucket lists lie in tattered shreds. Now is the time for twiddling thumbs and casting around for things to do, right?

Fortunately for you, we at The Sisterhood have a foolproof plan to keep you all happy and sane for the next few weeks. So pry those kiddos away from the xbox, extricate them from the latest Youtube videos, and take this show on the road.

We spend many a summer day toting water bottles and packing bug spray as we venture with our crews into The Great Outdoors. We would not marinate in DEET or unleash our inner camel if we didn’t think the payout was worth the effort.

1. Nature is a top-notch noise buffer.

On our latest hike, my sister-in-law Kim said, without any trace of irony, as her children screeched past with their thundering herd of cousins, “I prefer to parent outside.”

We totally get what she means. Nature is the ultimate white noise: no pesky walls to bounce back annoying sibling smacktalk or worse.

Besides, when you are outside, you can always hang back and pretend all that noise is coming from someone else’s kid.

Why You Should Get Your Kids Outside and On A Trail---Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

This is what 145 decibels of little boy looks like. Monkeys in the wild are ridiculously loud.

2. Nature brings out their creativity.

There is nothing like wide open spaces and some cool finds along the trail to bring out their inner woodland fairy or superhero.

They look like a movie poster for The Avengers: The Preschool Years

3. Nature is the ultimate arena.

We are extremely lucky to live a stone’s throw from a great state park that participates in Maryland’s Parkquest, but our experience hiking and camping all over our local environs is that every park has some kind of fun to offer. Frisbee golf and geocaching are the most common games we have found, but you won’t know until you go (or check their website).

Check out these “reindeer” games!

4. Hiking is a great workout.

Simply putting one foot in front of the other for three to six miles will make you feel so much better about all those extra ice cream cones and hot dogs you have been consuming on behalf of summer fun. Of course, finding a copper head on the trail might accelerate your heart rate a bit but that just means you can have the sprinkles, right?

Of course, children pretending to fall off mountains should be left to the mercy of said copperheads. The near heart attack for you means you can add some whipped cream and a cherry.

5. Some of the very best places you can’t get to by car.

Marco Polo will have nothing on you and all you need is a pair of hiking boots or sneakers.

One of the shelters on the Appalachian Trail

6. The view from the top.

It works literally and as a metaphor. Take your kids up a mountain and let them see the reward of all that hard work for themselves. Why You Should Get Your Kids Outside and On A Trail---Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

7. There will be moments that melt your heart.

Teens and tweens aren’t always cute and cuddly any more but stick them on a trail and they surprise you in the best ways. We have also found that a trail is a great place to talk, kind of like the car but without all the smelly sneakers and sports gear fumes.

And of course. . .

Memories that will last forever

7 Reasons You Should Tell Your Kids to Take a Hike

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Fourth Time Is A Charm: Should You Have a Fourth Child?

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A friend with an equally oversized brood once said, “Every time I open the van doors, I hear circus music.” Amen, sister, and I never unloaded a minivan again without cuing up a little Big Top soundtrack in my head. Big families are many things, but subtle we are not.

One thing we most definitely are is loyal.

Eleven years ago today, I had my fourth child, a beautiful healthy baby boy. I checked off that box of having a family that mirrored my happy one growing up. But even basking in that bucolic heady mix of newborn love and sleep deprivation, my most Pollyanna self could see that I was also in one hell of a pickle. My husband was set to travel for ten days through South America on the day the baby turned a month old.

A mere two days before the start of school. Gulp.

My mother was a teacher so there was no way she could miss the first week of school, and my mother-in-law was traveling as well. My sister lived in Chicago. All of my friends were busy getting their own kids back to school. In short, I was going to be left to the mercy of the orcs as I tried to get my then six year old and four year old fed, dressed, happy, and on their merry way with a newborn and a really, really helpful two year old.

Help came in the form of my youngest brother, my parents’ number 4, who was in college an hour away. Jonathan would leave classes in the evening and drive an hour north every day for the first week of school. He spent the night and helped me feed and dress everybody every morning that first week and then went back to his classes. He held babies or hands. He changed diapers or TV channels. He filled sippy cups and downtime. He was in short the fairy godmother I so desperately needed with a little more facial hair and less high heels.

Whenever someone asks me if they should have a fourth child, I tell them this story. On the one hand, I think you need to be completely upfront and honest about what you are getting yourself into. That circus music, those sippy cups, that sense of being taken down by some creature no matter how fantastical it may seem—that’s all real. If you are thinking of lowering the birth control defense line, you should have some idea of what you are welcoming across the border.

This is the other story I tell. When Deacon was nine months old, I hosted a get-together with some old friends. I had showered, put on the fancy non-stained GAP t-shirt, and even baked some of my famous chocolate chip cookies. Old friends are the best at delivering the type of fun that makes you forget yourself completely or, in this case, forget to feed your kid. I walked into the kitchen and there was baby Deacon with his hands deep in a box of Cheerios feeding himself a little snack. He didn’t even dump the box on the floor. Good baby, good Momma, good story.

But be open to a fourth child if that’s what your heart desires. Deacon was then and has forever forth been the easiest of children. Sweet and reliable, Deacon is a happy ballast for our family. The steady sturdy tenacity he brings to every aspect of life makes all of our days better. He makes lunches for teens who are too grumpy, cooks a hot breakfast for himself and his dad, and finds all the missing socks, belts, and shoes, and that’s just what he does in the morning.

As parents, we revel in the allure of doing this all the fourth time around and the singular pleasure of him for himself. The gift of having many children is a chance to do every age again and see all of it through another pair of eyes coming into his own.

Today, Deacon moves ever more firmly into the land of tween. Nobody knows how the tumult of the teen years will change him, but I think, like his uncle before him, he will retain his essential sweetness. All of our babies have their own special glow, and the fourth time is really, truly a charm.