Tag Archives: Friends

Reading the Signs: Finding the Magic in the Everyday

Having never been a stone’s throw or even a short car ride away from family my entire marriage, I appreciate the things my friends who are like family, my framily (I used this term way before Sprint), bring to my life. I like to repay them for their myriad acts of kindness and for just bearing with the sheer volume of us. I tend to do this by showing up at school plays and soccer games far from where my actual kids either work or play.

Reading the Signs: Finding the Magic in the Everyday | When honesty and serendipity intersect, inspiration happens.  This was a good sign that my life is just the right size for helping me find my way back to people I care about even in unexpected places.

On Friday night, I headed  with a vanful of my people to a nearby town to watch a play where some framily  members were singing and dancing in the chorus and rocking the tech crew. As we were leaving, I saw a waning crescent moon with Venus and Mars perfectly framed in the front windshield. It was a Whoa, there! moment for sure. “Tech down, folks,” I cried from the front seat, “this is a sign of portent. Good things are a-coming.”

Crescent Moon with Venus and Mars

Love this great amateur photo and the others like it that I found here

When we arrived at the huge urban high school, it looked like perhaps I had misread the sign. The parking lot in front of the the theater was completely packed—-buses, cars, vans, double-parked cars, triple-parked cars, cars on top of cars kind of packed. It was a madhouse without all the fun sideshows. Clearly there was also no room for the likes of us near the nice, warm, inviting entrance. Now normally this would be no big deal, but school systems all over the region had actually cancelled school on this Friday due to dangerously low temperatures. Nobody wanted to hoof it even half a block in the sub zeros.

After dropping off the kids at the nice, warm entrance like good moms, my friend Gina and I steadied ourself for Survivor: Mini-Van Edition.  Just as we despaired of finding anything within a non-frostbite-inducing walk, a lucky glance sideways found another entrance around the back. In the next five minutes, we found not just a place to park, but Gina’s dad (who had until this point been incommunicado—a major point of stress in our already harried hunt), an open back door, and front row seats. Sign of portent indeed.

The play was so much better than I could have hoped for in a high school production that I wasn’t even counting the minutes until intermission, but when it came, my middle son popped out of his seat and said, “Mom, I found this. What should I do with it?” I took the men’s wallet in his hand and opened it. As I looked inside the still full wallet, my eyes widened a little when I read the ID, “Well, buddy, I know exactly what we are going to do.”

As it turned out, the wallet belonged to the son of a friend of mine who I had met back in the days of babysitting co-op and now kept in touch with through my book club. Lucy and I had just seen each other on Wednesday, and I quickly contacted her and told her the story.

She was completely floored that we found it. Her grown son had lost the wallet over a month ago when he attended his sister’s play at the school. They had looked everywhere extensively including the seat in the front row that my son happened to have been sitting in. We were both pretty amazed at the serendipity of my son who is not a student at the school finding the wallet of her son who is not a student there either.

Sometimes it's more than just a coincidence. Reading the Signs---Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

Lucy’s Facebook Update as proof

When I told Steve the story, he said, “Wow, you’re Forrest Gump.”

Our amazing coincidence not withstanding, maybe I shouldn’t have been so surprised.  People have stories like this one all the time. Stories where lives intersect in beautiful, seemingly improbable ways are the ones we gravitate towards. They hint at a thread connecting us all and that little joy, that hint of magic, adds a little color in our lives and definitely injects a little warmth into a frigid cold February night.

The fact that my magical little moment probably isn’t such a special, singular event in the scheme of things doesn’t diminish it at all for me though. I’m taking it as a good sign that my life is just the right size for helping me find my way back to people I care about even in unexpected places.

Life may not be a box of chocolates, but it certainly is sweet.

Reading the Signs: Finding the Magic in the Everyday---Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

Where the REAL magic happens: when friends become family

Reading the Signs: Finding the Magic in the Everyday

More framily fun!

-Erin

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Picky Eaters are the Worst and Other Secrets of Friendship

Ellen here. People frequently ask us how we blog together and our reply is that our friendship just makes it work. Not the most helpful answer if you’re trying to find the secret to creating a blogging partnership, but people generally nod their heads. And people who know us really think they have us pegged. They think that Erin’s “happy-go-lucky-ness” balances out my “fly-off-the-handle-ness.”

It’s a lie.

Erin: Lie just seems so ugly. I know I have a tendency to lose the big picture and spazz over the details, but I keep that to myself. And to you and Steve. And to my sister. BUT, to the world, I am still waters.  And I AM easy-going.

Ellen: Are you now? One word: food.

Erin: I don’t even know where you are going with this. I like everything.

Ellen: Do you now? I was hoping you would just ‘fess up, but you’re forcing my hand. Okay then: cantaloupe.

Erin: Blaaaahhhh! Cantaloupe is so disgusting. It’s the texture. It’s slimy and . . . you know what? I am allowed to not like cantaloupe.

Ellen: I would agree, except you like honeydew and kiwi. If texture is the issue, they are all the same.

Erin: THEY ARE NOT! And don’t you talk about kiwi like that. I love it! My kids do say it’s like eating gelatinous boogers, but I love, love, love it! Every part is fantastic: the sour, the crunch of the seeds. It does something to my cheeks. It makes them feel all happy and fuzzy. I’m feeling it now just thinking about it. Kiwis are nature’s Sour Patch Kids.
Kiwi on Make A Gif

“I love what kiwis do to my cheeks!”

 

Ellen: Once again, you Erin-ed it up so no one is going to realize what a princess you are.

Erin: You’re mean.

Ellen: You make me mean. It’s your fault. You’re all bubbly, but maddeningly inconsistent.

Erin: That’s okay because you make up for your meanness with moments of kindness, kind of like a kiwi.

Ellen: I don’t know what that even means. Moving on: tomatoes.

Erin: I LOVE tomatoes. Mmmmm, summer tomatoes. I can eat a whole one as a snack with just a little bit of salt and pepper sprinkled on it.

Ellen: But your love has prejudice and conditions. What about cherry tomatoes?

Erin: Yeah, I don’t like the texture; once again slimy.

Ellen: No, they’re not. They’re crunchy.

Erin: Yeah, I do feel like I should like them so I try them every time.

Ellen: No you don’t! You just push them to the side of the plate without ever taking even a nibble. Which brings me to your next quirk: leaving your rejects for others to deal with.

Erin: I just feel bad about throwing food away.

Ellen: But you don’t feel bad about other people butlering away your scraps after they have congealed for a minute or fifty?

Erin: You know, I am the worst with cereal. I LOVE cereal. In fact when I first met Steve, I hopped up on his counter, picked up a whole box of his cereal, and dug in up to my elbow for that crunchy goodness–

Ellen: Which reminds me about your problem with boundaries, too.

Erin: I know. I wasn’t even his girlfriend yet. But I was just giving an example of how much I love cereal because here is the twist. If it has more than a tablespoon of milk splashed on it, it is dead to me. I will abandon that bowl in a heartbeat . . . and now that I think about it, I leave it for someone else to clean up.

Ellen: I feel like you’re growing and learning before my very eyes.

Erin: Oh yeah, and then there are eggs. I LOVE scrambled eggs, but they have to be fluffy. There can’t be any big chunks of scramble.

Ellen: You can squish down the chunks with your fork.

Erin: No you can’t! It does not change the texture. I have rejected perfectly good breakfast sandwiches lovingly prepared by my husband because of scramble chunks.

Ellen: Okay, while you don’t rule the land of high maintenance, you certainly don’t deserve the crown of easy-going.

Erin: Oh come on. There must be foods you don’t like.

Ellen: I don’t like curry, but not to be a brat, that is a pretty common food to dislike.

Erin: I LOVE curry. And coconut.

Ellen: Those are two commonly hated foods, and coconut because of its texture. You’re an enigma wrapped up in a tortilla. My only point is YOU’RE NOT THAT EASY-GOING. You just hide it well. And I’m here so you don’t believe your own hype. That never goes well. Just look at Justin Beiber.

Erin: You ARE nice like a kiwi. I’m going to choose to look at this as tough love. I do tend to get wrapped up in the small stuff when I get overwhelmed. And then I tend to start freaking out on the inside, but shellacking it with a happy face on the outside. It’s always so much better when I reveal the panic to you. You handle triage like a mofo.

Ellen: You know what I say, “If there’s no blood hitting floor, is there really a reason to panic?” I just tend to have a very short ramp leading up to irritation which leads to my fly-off-the-handle reputation. I had a friend once say that I am the worst at suffering fools.

Erin: That’s okay because I am the worst at suffering cantaloupe.

And that’s how this blogging/friendship thing works, folks. We balance each other out . . . and when that doesn’t work we rat each other out on the internet.

Picky Eaters Are the Worst and Other Secrets of Friendship. Humor makes every relationship better. - Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

-Ellen and Erin

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We Get Along Like Cats and Dogs

The world loves a dynamic duo—think Lucy and Ethel, Laverne and Shirley, Thelma and Louise—but we are a bit unique in the blogosphere being a writing duo and all. Our work divisions, our idea generation, our everything seems to flow organically from our actual friendship. In other words, there is not a concrete division of labor, but things seem to kind of naturally flow from our real-life conversations and adventures.

We say to people who ask “how we do it” that we could never blog with anyone else. Our advice would be to pick your best, most honest, generous friend and hope with all your might that she is also a great writer. It’s lightning in a bottle over here, although we do have a mission statement. The truth of the matter is that while we share many similar interests and always have a good time together, we are definitely coming at life and blogging from different perspectives.

Erin: But we did write that one piece where we described our writing process like it was a volleyball game. We may have been overdosing on the Olympics a little at the time, but overall,  it felt pretty accurate.

Ellen: If, by accurate, you mean we were delusional when we compared ourselves to Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh Jennings, then I agree.

Erin: We weren’t claiming their abs, just their teamwork.

Ellen: But the truth is that we are probably a little more Garfield and Odie than May-Trainer and Jennings.

That’s why we can honestly say that  . . .

We Get Along Like Cats and Dogs How A Blog Partnership Works

Point #1: Stroking

Erin: Ellen is the quintessential cat. Independent, intelligent, and not easy to pin down,  Ellen has integrity. You have to earn her trust and respect and there is no way she could be bribed for a treat or even, say, a tweet.

Last week Ellen got retweeted by P!nk. THE P!nk. As in that exclamation point is not a typo because we are talking about the freakin’ for real P!NK! which is a pretty big deal. She was excited for sure, but if it had been me, I would have thrown a ticker tape parade and bought some balloons.

Pink Retweet

O.M.GEEEEEEEE! This even impressed my 15 year old, not my 13 year old, but 1 out of 2 ain’t bad.

Ellen: Oh, really. I do believe you greeted me by saying, “Hey, I saw your Twitter thing.” Meanwhile, yesterday, you got retweeted by two regular citizens and you called me up, “I’m so proud of myself!! I’ve gotten back in the Twitter game and I got two, TWO, of my quips retweeted! How cool is that!?” My tweet is still going round and round Twitterland thanks to P!nk’s 21 MILLION rabid followers and you want a bacon treat for being broadcast to 80 extra people.

Erin: Down, girl. I feel like I should throw you some catnip.

Ellen: On the other hand, you are, without a doubt, the dog. Loyal, friendly, and playful, you are every bit a girl’s best friend as long as I make sure to stick to a stroking schedule. I collect things to say like “Good Erin,” “That’s a great job,” and “Aren’t you the best little blogger in the world for not breaking the site when you added that plug-in?” to toss out twenty times a day.

Erin:  When have I ever added a plug-in?

Ellen: All I am saying is that you like a good ham bone and to have your belly scratched.

Point #2: Enthusiasm

Ellen: One of your frequent mannerisms is begging like a dog when you get excited. You literally (yes, I AM using this word 100% accurately) say “Paws up!”  when you get excited about something. I practically have to carry around Scooby snacks for you.

erin puppy

Photo not staged. AT. ALL.

Erin:  That’s really okay, Team Cat. I’ve gotten used to the classic Ellen  “I know it was awesome, I don’t need your congratulations.”

Ellen: I’m going to give you a slow blink on that one and a flick of my . . . tail and move on.

Point #3: We Gave Birth to Our Own Kind

Erin: You know how people say having a puppy is like having a baby? Well, in my case, the reverse is true too. My kids are constantly tugging on me, bumping up against me, and hanging off me—and that is just the teens.  My litter may all technically be housebroken, but you cannot leave them unattended for too long or the whole place goes to the dogs if you get my not-too-subtle drift.  As the proverbial Queen of this Puppy Pound, I feel like I am stockpiling balls and treats just to keep these puppies happy.

Ellen: And my girls are just like me. Basically, they come around for me to feed them, then they go about their business. They’re purrr-fect. The example that proves the rule: My 15 year old just made All County Orchestra.  I had to specifically ask her if she had heard any results. Her reply?

“Yeah, I found out last week. I made it.” Then she sauntered away. Tail flick explicitly implied.

Ultimately, our particular brand of blog magic comes because we complement each other. We were never yin and yang or Oscar and Felix, but were, and still remain, a Tom and Jerry for the new millennium. Erin brings an energy and enthusiasm that is hard to deny or contain (it’s better to just ride that wave, honestly) while Ellen keeps it real and keeps us on track (you really do want her in your getaway car, the girl has mad skills).

And then there’s that other special ingredient that makes it extra fun AND extra special: the fact that we are great friends who love and care for our kids, our friends, our little ole blog, and each other.

Erin: Woof.

Ellen: Meow back at ya.

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Ten Things You Might Not Know About Us

We are traveling fools. Just this month collectively we have visited Washington, DC, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, and Western Maryland. Our Samsonite is begging for some time off, but we are pressing on. Every time we load the ole minivan up and head out, fun things happen.

Our trip last week to Pennsylvania was no exception.  Not only did we meet two more of our online friends and co-authors Stephanie Giese of Binkies and Briefcases and Meredith Spidel of Mom of the Year, but we had the chance to hang out at Kismet Consignment.

cupcake

Yeah, we travel for cupcakes. What of it?

Between the cupcakes, the cute clothes, the great furniture and accessories, the books and, of course, these wonderful ladies, it was a girl’s dream night out!

ellen

Complete with a fabulous LBD for Ellen, a great necklace, and, of course, our favorite book!

We especially appreciated meeting all the fans of I Just Want to Pee Alone and You Have Lipstick On Your Teeth who came out to have their books signed. And did we mention how much we LERV our co-authors?

better stphanie n merdeith

Aren’t they the cutest? Stephanie and Meredith are just as adorable in person as their dresses!

One thing became abundantly clear as we talked to everyone: they were curious to scratch the surface of our blogging duo. So we decided that now might be just the right time to give you all some dirt. On each other.

ethel kennedy

No, Erin is not one of the missing Kennedys, although she does channel Ethel from time to time. Our secrets aren’t really tabloid-worthy.  Yet.

While the following revelations might not make a Kardashian worry about her day job, they might help you get to know us a little better.

10 things you might not know about us

Erin Shares About Ellen:

1. Ellen travels with a capital “T”. I knew Ellen and Frank went places, but we all go places. They GO places. In the past few years, they have visited Costa Rica, Mexico, San Francisco, Chicago, New York City, Washington, DC, taken a cruise to the Bahamas, and done Disney. This is just hitting the highlights. They also go to the beach, and we camp together TWICE every summer. But it’s not just that they go fabulous places, they do fabulous things once they’re there. They climb stuff and rappel off things and swim with sea creatures and find great hideaway restaurants and visit don’t-miss museums. Their photo albums look like travel brochures. In one of our conversations, Ellen said that she would rather spend money on experiences than things. She’s not just talk, this one.

2. Ellen still has mad medicine skills. If you didn’t know yet that Ellen is a doctor, you should probably know that. While she chose to gracefully exit the medical profession stage right to raise her kids full-time, she never really put away those skills. She is our resident medical go-to girl for all things that might bleed, blister, or keep you up at night with worry.  The way she explains technical medical things to us lay folk reminds me that she would be awesome in a practice or on TV as one of those medical correspondents. Move over Dr. Nancy Snyderman, Ellen still has game.

3. Ellen makes a cake so good that I actually tried and LOVE Nutella. The very notion of Nutella used to make me gag, but this cake made me a convert. If you make it, it will make you the Belle of the Ball, so if you are looking for a fairy godmother, Ellen just might be your girl.  Oh, and the cakes she makes her kids—fuggedaboutit. Forget fairy godmother. You’ll want to be adopted, so you can call her mom and eat these ridiculous confections. Really.

4. Ellen is willing to jump off that cliff–metaphorically and literally. Remember what I said about her awesome travel escapades? Ellen is always ready for fun. And challenges. I have yet to find anything that scares her or makes her say, “whoa, that ain’t gonna happen”. Ellen is the girl that gets things done. Period. Again, if she can think it up, it’s already halfway done.

ellen goofball

Ellen can find fun in a paper bag or, in this case, posing with a photograph!

5. Ellen is tech-y in a good way. It took me a while to find my footing in the more technical aspects of blogging, but Ellen took to it like a duck to water. She is always two steps ahead of me on that front which I appreciate, because she is an extremely generous friend when it comes to knowledge and sharing it. I have learned a ton, mostly from her showing me the way.

 Ellen Shares About Erin:

1. Erin is a whiskey drinking girl. Erin will partake of a mellow merlot or a cold brew, but her first choice is a whiskey sour slushie. It’s her fun-loving Irish roots shining through, but it always surprises me and makes me smile. She is such a gentle soul and whiskey just seems like a bar brawl fire-starter.

2. Erin is the ring leader, CEO, and Grandmaster Flash of fun. When we go on our Big Love trips with sixteen children ranging in age from 5 to 18, Erin orchestrates getting us fed, corralling us out the door, and divving us up into canoes. But you know her super duper secret that you should tattoo on the bottom of your foot for future reference? She is FLEXIBLE. She is not a slave to her schedules. The masses revolt because they don’t want to get out the door by 8 am? No problem. We’re having a blast at the playground and don’t want to start on the hike? No problem. She should have the theme song, “Enjoy the fun you’re with” playing around her at all times.

3.  Erin is your role model for how NOT to hold a grudge. Erin is amazing. You can have a calm discussion with her, come to an agreement, and then she – wait for it – moves on. It is like watching a miracle unfold before your eyes. It is truly in the category of unicorns and leprechauns. There is a dark side though, but it is only for her. She assumes other people are also this generous and she has gotten burned. I’ve told her more than once that perhaps she didn’t get kicked enough as a kid. Hmmm, reading this over, I may need to work on my graciousness. I definitely have my cynicism down pat.

4. Erin loves fire. She really loves it. I’m a girl who has used her fireplace twice in 14 years. Her family’s most cherished times are spent around their fire pit. She is a girl who uses fire as an entertaining staple. Don’t forget she brought us the “Bonfire to Go“.

5. Erin is a master of organization, diplomacy, and calm . . . except when she is not. In the land of  calm, Erin is the cucumber when kids are breaking arms or scrabbling with each other like feral cats. For the love of the Brady Bunch, she keeps her five kids’ lives trucking along in the most fantastically enriched, grounded, and fun manner possible. And she does it without an Alice —  but on second thought she does it without the hindrance of a Cindy, so really it’s a wash. But she is only human as demonstrated by her sock sack of shame.

What’s the big deal you say? Just you wait.

She also takes a stand on the most unlikely issues. Discussing religion and politics? The United Nations should attend her charm school. Discussing Andy Griffith? Insert the sound of an explosion in your head.

We hope our little peek behind the curtain has made you curious enough to delve a little deeper.

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  Welcome, Welcome, one and all!

-Ellen and Erin

 

 

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We Remember

Erin: Last week, we gathered at a river.

It was just as poetic and lovely in real life as it sounds. Family traveled from our far corners—Pittsburgh and Florida and California, my dear Frederick, and good ole’ Baltimore—and we gathered by that beautiful river and we remembered my sweet, funny, smart, and lovely grandmother Charlotte who died a year ago.

grandma

One of the benefits of a life well-lived and well-loved is that people will miss you when you are gone and want to remember you. And we really did. There were tears, of course, but also funny stories and lots of she-would-have-loved-thises and I-can’t-believe-she-is-gones.  We also wanted to do something. Remembering is active after all.

So my aunt Holly brought a lantern (completely biodegradable in case you were worried) from one of her science units, we ignited the flame . . .

balloon 3

. . . and we launched that purple lantern into the darkening sky.

balloon 2

We watched in silence as the purple lantern faded from sight, each of us sharing one heart in that moment, remembering together.

Today, there are people gathering at other waters to remember another lost loved one. Our friend Courtney from Our Small Moments is saying goodbye to her way too young husband Scott. Her two small children and all the friends and family who loved him over the course of his too short life will honor his memory with a celebration. There will be funny stories and tears and he-was-too-damn-youngs and cancer-can-suck-its. There will be that visceral need to just remember him.

Our blogging friends have all been sucker-punched by the sad story of Scott’s diagnosis of angiosarcoma of the pleura in December to his death this week even while we have been astounded by our friend Courtney’s limitless supply of love, honesty, faith in God, and hope through his illness. We want to remember Scott and help our friend. We want to remember the family that they were by helping the family they are now. We want to remember together.

In that vein, we have joined forces to create a Give Forward campaign that will help Courtney with all of the medical bills they have accrued over the year. Consider giving with us in remembrance of someone you love. Remembering is an act, after all.

Give Forward

To read more about this family’s honest and lovely “small moments”, visit Courtney’s blog.

Also, if you are so inclined, our blogging friends have written some beautiful posts about this family too.

You can read Leslie’s, Ilana’s, Stephanie’s, Jen’sKim’s, Kerry’s, Janel’s, Rebecca’s, Kelley’s, Meredith’s, Paige’s, and Allison’s.

scott

We can all remember this young man.

Consider this a fleetful of purple lanterns let loose upon the internet.

-Erin and Ellen

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Click here to donate to the Give Forward campaign for Scott’s family.

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Halloween Needed a Champion and That Champion Was Erin

Maybe everyone is hyped up on the political juice of the season. Maybe the stress of Hurricane Sandy caused people to crack. Maybe the ambiguity of the Mayan calendar is spurring people to obsessively weigh their life choices. Whatever the cause, our county leadership lost their minds over . . . Halloween Trick-or-Treating.

In all fairness, the brouhaha began to bubble because of the uncertainty of the storm. Before the hurricane hit, the mayors of the towns in our county decided to move Halloween to Friday. The County Commissioners and the newspaper were not made aware of this momentous decision, thus the headline on Wednesday proclaimed “Halloween Trick-or-Treating in Cecil County Tonight from 6 – 8 pm.” Hardly earthshaking news since Wednesday was October 31st.

But oh it was! The towns had said Friday! But the towns are in the county and the newspaper said it was tonight! Retractions and clarifications flew up on the newspaper and county websites with the final proclamation: “Bonus Holiday: Trick-or-Treating on two nights. Trick-or-Treating in the County on Wednesday and in the Towns on Friday.” This went up at 12:30 pm. On Wednesday. The day of Halloween.

And the collective response heard ’round the county was “Huh”? WTH? The TOTAL population in Cecil County is about 102,000. We are extremely rural and sprawling. You are hard pressed to really decide where the towns end and the countryside begins. The county seat is Elkton, but there are folks with an Elkton zip code who would be hard pressed to make it to town center in a half-days’ time by horse and buggy.  Just go with it, we’re trying to paint a picture here.

But in the midst of the chaos, one woman stood up, worked her Facebook account like the town crier from a bygone era and proclaimed: “Halloween will be in MY neighborhood on October 31st! Who’s coming?”

This is that woman.

 

There was some further confusion on Facebook, but did Erin waiver? She did not. She took to the streets and made signs to post throughout the neighborhood. She fielded phone calls and sent out texts.

 

She bought a bonfire to go.

Who knew?

 

She raided the Hurricane supplies and she ordered pizza.

 

And the people came from all corners of the county heeding the call of this innovative woman.

Children were costumed.

Charlie Brown Ghost Costume. How awesome is this?

 

Props were tested.

Nerf Attack Team and Katniss on Fire

 

And the children set out to reclaim October 31st as the one and only true Halloween.

Charlie Brown, Super Chicken, and Gruesome

 

The bonfire was lit.

Relax. No pagan ceremonies took place. At least that is the story we agreed upon.

 

And fun was had by all.

 

So can one voice make a difference? Can one woman fight the establishment?  We say, “Yes!” Except in Ellen’s neighborhood where they prefer their insurrections to be stealth. They’re trick-or-treating on Saturday, November 3rd.
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Flummoxing Technology: The Rubbish List

This post was written in response to a Monday Listicle prompt, but as you can see, it turned into much more than a list. It is actually a little, tiny portal showing some of the nuts and bolts of how two women cooperate to write a blog together. If you have never visited us before, Erin and I CO-AUTHOR the blog posts and transcribe them like our conversations. This requires a level of cooperation that nations should strive to achieve as a model for world peace. Seriously.

So, without further ado, we are linking up to Yeah Write Me #48. Head on over there to check out more great blogs. It is our favorite place to catch up on our reading.

                                       – Ellen

Ellen– Stasha at The Good Life  hosts this fabulous fun party known as the Monday Listicles. (If I get any comments pointing out that it is now Tuesday, I might drop kick a stuffed animal. Do you want that on your conscience?) This week’s Monday Listicles topic comes from Jessica at My Time As Mom, who suggested we make a list of things we’re rubbish at. And since Stasha personally asked/challenged us to join in, I immediately called Erin. (Ok, maybe she didn’t challenge, per se, but I am rubbish at turning down a request.)

ErinYesterday Ellen could barely speak, had a fever, and was suffering from one of the more heinous upper respiratory infections making the rounds in our fair county.  This point is significant, because today, slightly less feverish and ill, she rose from her bed and practically BEGGED me to write this list.

Ellen– I was thinking it was so much cheaper than mediation and would require less energy than slugging it out in one of those inflatable sumo wrestling rings.

ErinYou see, I am absolute RUBBISH at technology. This is not a big deal unless you have decided to partner with me to write a blog. And then it’s a big, stinking, miserable deal, because blogging is only partially about writing.

Ellen– It is a whole lot about mastering technology and making it your biotch.

Erin–  I keep hearing Kelly Clarkson singing, “That which doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” Watch out for Ellen then.  Really. After blogging with me, she will be able to lift a bus with one hand. She really will be able to wear those red boots and lasso. 

 

Without further ado, the top ten things about technology that flummox me, thus almost kill Ellen, and at which I am absolute rubbish:

1. My Virtual Mailbox

ErinAhh, email. This lovely technology has made my life easier in so many ways and completely highlights how little attention I give to organizing certain things. Like email. In the earliest days of our blog, Ellen emailed me everything she could find about blogging.

Ellen– Lots of these were about technology, folks. Take note that until about four months ago, I would have sworn HTML code was a coupon for H&M.

ErinShe even organized the emails in a folder on her Gmail account—I would NEVER even think to do something like that.  Later, but not THAT much later, Ellen got irritated with me, because she thought I was ignoring her emails.

Ellen- Gee, they were only about getting our domain name pinned down.

Erin-I was responding. Truly. But on further inspection, they were stuck in my outbox. Oy. No words. Just oy.

 

2. My Voicemail

ErinYeah, my Voicemail on my home phone and cellphone are both full. I have lost the access numbers and passwords. My BIL Dan tried to help me rectify this over Christmas. He has the patience of a saint, but after about thirty minutes he Pontius Pilated me and washed his hands of the whole mess. When your patron saint declares you a lost cause, you know you’ve got troubles.

Ellen– I sometimes resort to telepathic powers to communicate with her.

 

3. Posting Pictures

ErinTo be fair, posting pictures to a blog is one of the trickier things to learn early on. There’s re-sizing, and LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS of choices. Thumbnail, medium, full-size. Right, left, center. It’s like the Starbucks of visual media, and all I was looking for was a little coffee. On the Blirth-day of the blog, Ellen was setting up Google Analytics, Twitter, and, well, everything else. Meanwhile, I was trying to put my picture on my bio. It took AWHILE.

Ellen– I was actually generating code and she called me expecting a celebration when she got a picture posted.

ErinI have gotten better, but it’s SLOW.

 

4. Distinguishing Activity From Productivity

ErinOne of the unwritten rules is that blogs are like houses in a lovely community and you are supposed to make the rounds and COMMENT on them.  Hey, nice curtains, lovely rug–that sort of thing. The first time we linked up to Yeah Write Me, I read like 50 blogs, wrote a lovely, lengthy email to Ellen about who we should vote for and why, but I didn’t write a single comment on a single blog.  Yeah, I know. (Head hung in shame)

Ellen– Don’t worry folks, I’m all about playing fair, so I swept behind and commented up a storm.

 

5. Linking Things Up

ErinIt’s kind of a key part of blogging to link things, but I break links like they are a china shop, and I am a bull. Letters appear out of nowhere and attach themselves in funny places BREAKING the link. I don’t copy the whole address BREAKING the link. I don’t even know WHAT I do and I end up BREAKING the link. To say that it’s a problem might be the understatement of the century.

Ellen– Maybe just checking every link you “think” you have posted, might be a goal? I feel like I just channeled Dr. Seuss.

 

6. Posting Videos

ErinAGAIN. It bites me twice, because we also like to add videos to our blog posts. Well, the story here starts with my optimistic email to Ellen that read, “Hey, I loaded the video. Blog is ready to go!” Um, well, not really. I hadn’t actually added anything but a link to YouTube that took readers away from our site.

Ellen– And a picture of the video that took you to a blank page.

ErinDon’t you wish you had a partner just like me??

 

7. Using My Awesome, Superduper, SmartPhone

ErinThis phone is like a bucking bronco I can’t break. It pocket-dials, refuses to return emails, tweets when it feels like it, and only surfs the net when the mood strikes it. I took it back to the store and they claimed it was an ID10T error.

Ellen– Hmmmm.

 

8. Mastering My MAC

ErinI am the world’s worst spokesperson for the world’s best computer brand. Apple makes products for people just like me. Everything about Apple is supposedly intuitive and user-friendly. I am the unfriendliest user EVER.

Ellen– She actually FROZE the screen. I have spent years having Mac users snarkily tell me to abandon my PC because Macs are so foolproof.

ErinThis is such a rare occurrence with a MAC that the Apple Geniuses almost had me escorted out the door by the cops who stand sentry. The bottom line is that I don’t even know how to harness all my power for good.

Ellen– Yet.

 

9. Attending To Details

ErinSo much of technology in general, and blogging technology specifically, is the ability to dot i’s and cross t’s. I am a big idea person; the details often confound me or in this case poor Ellen. I regularly forget to check boxes that tag our posts or bring readers back to our pages. My husband Steve calls this Erin phenomena “Oh, look, a rock.” As in, Erin is swimming around a fishbowl and “Oh, look, a rock.”  Over and over and over. I get lost a lot too.

Ellen– She DID NOT inform me that her hubby had named a phenomenon about her attention span before I agreed to start blogging with her. Just sayin’.

 

10. Squashing My Utter, Gripping, Handicapping Fear

ErinEllen was out for jury duty two weeks ago and left me in charge of the blog. I was sweating like it was a heat wave in August. I know me. Too damn well. I knew I would forget to check a box, or break a link, or post a picture upside down or backward (I know you think it can’t be done, but I am like the anti-superhero of the computerworld—just watch me!).

Ellen– She does produce a force field that makes even my computer go wiggy sometimes. I think she should get her dental work inspected.

ErinAnd it’s not like Ellen has all that much computer background, she’s just not terrified of it. I buck, I stomp, I stone-cold back away from the challenge of it all. But the thing about calling a spade a spade, or in this case, myself RUBBISH, is that it takes the power of it all away.  Words can tame the beast. In our house we say, “Fight the Tiger; Embrace the Mountain.” All this time, I thought technology was the tiger at the door, but really it’s just the mountain to climb. And I’m going to get my gear on. Really.

 

Bonus

Ellen– I hope so! But there is one more thing at which Erin is rubbish: giving herself props. She has the most accepting and good-natured disposition of any woman I have ever met. Her kindness knows no bounds. She is the friend we all rely on to deliver hard to hear news to members of the Sisterhood because she truly has a gift for being non-abrasive. She is the Labrador Retriever of women, friend to all. She can also accept criticism like no one I have ever seen. Grace should be her middle name. It is the only thing that can explain why she still takes my calls (of course, she has to have her phone turned on). Let’s face it, it’s one heck of a woman who would write this post.

Erin I just didn’t want to rent the inflatable sumo suits.

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