Boy Bands Are For Cougars Too

I originally wrote this post in the Fall of 2012, but it was time to give it another whirl since I am fresh off of seeing One Direction live with my daughters. Today seemed liked a good day to do it since my ears finally stopped ringing from the hysteria of 19,000 screaming girls. But don’t sign me up for martyrdom just yet. Read on. -Ellen

Ellen as a Directioner

 

I’m not exactly over the hill, but let’s just say I can see the crest without squinting. So a “What the fudge?” might be expected when One Direction is discovered on my iPod, Twitter feed, DVR, and Instagram. (Holla for the new secret boards on Pinterest.)

But I have a free pass. One Direction permeates my life, because I have 11 and 14 year old daughters! They are my ticket out of creepy Cougarville. Truly. I can barely write this post, because I’m waiting to push the record button to catch 1D on The Today Show. I can’t record the whole two hours. Are you mad? Our DVR is bursting with classics like Three o’clock High and Caddyshack. I need room for The X-Factor tonight. And I swear I’ll get around to watching those seven episodes of The Ellen Show.

But I have a confession to make. I may have a wee bit of a crush on them. Stop dialing Child Protective Services. They’re all legal. Granted I could have given birth to any one of them without starring on Teen Mom, BUT my beer pong career would have been cut tragically short. As the saying goes, “Familiarity breeds infatuation.” Or at least that’s the truth with boy bands. Stop rolling your eyes.

Come on! Look at these guys! They are adorable.

One Direction Lads

Don’t know who they are? Well for the love of teen angst, tear your eyes away from The National Enquirer in the checkout line and glance at the journalistic staple that is Us Magazine. They are a group of British and Irish lads thrown together by Simon Cowell after they auditioned on the British edition of The X Factor. Their first album Up All Night went straight to number one on the Billboard 200, selling 176,000 copies in its first week, making One Direction the first British group in history to achieve this feat with their debut album. The Beatles didn’t even do that (although back in the day, you had to do more than know your mum’s credit card number and click a button to buy music). They are being called the reinvention of the “British Invasion.” Impressed?

And you know you can relate. How many of you had your own boy band crushes growing up? Or had to pretend to listen to your girlfriends gush on and on about them?

Now raise your hand and hang your head if you were thinking YOUR boy band was WAY better than One Direction. Time  mellows the horror of acid-washed denim. I understand, but you got to admit that Cowell weeded out ALL of the goon factor when he put 1D together. Not talking about you, Justin Timberlake, never you. You’re the anti-goon.

So ‘N Sync was a little after my time, but I can remember my own infatuation with Duran Duran. Now, they were NOT a boy band. They played their own instruments for mullet’s sake, although Simon Le Bon might have fancied a bit of Auto-Tune vocal sweetening after a hard night of partying.

But I LUVVVVVVED them. I collected their magazines, t-shirts, buttons, albums, 12-inch singles, and biographies. All without the help of the internet. I had to mail order some of these treasures from the ads in the back of Tiger Beat for the love of archaic practices. Can’t you envision me explaining that to the grandkids?

I also had to sit tensely poised to hit the record button on the VCR for Friday Night Videos to catch me some Hungry Like The Wolf. Wait a minute.  I’m still doing that to this day because I’m too lazy to dump the DVR onto the external hard drive. Just goes to show you that the more things change the more they stay the same. But back then, there was no replay redemption with YouTube and Hulu. And you had to walk barefoot uphill to the VCR through a blizzard. Being a fan was a full-time job that paradoxically sucked away all of my babysitting money.

And apparently the kind of infatuated fandom that blossoms during adolescence worms its way into your very soul. When my daughters started showing signs of Fan Fever, I found myself drawn to the flame. I sat with them glued to YouTube reviewing the history of 1D’s formation on The X-Factor. I watched the fan diaries and the movie parodies. I watched their Saturday Night Live performance frame by frame so we could analyze their expressions. And oh yeah, I listen to their music LOUDLY every single day. It gives variety to the One Direction soundtrack stuck in my head.

I have done all of this without even a smidgen of patronizing indulgence. One of my greatest blessings from having children is getting to produce and partake in the childhood of my dreams. But to get to relive one of the bright spots? Just wonderful.  I love sharing it with them without one shred of cynicism. I’m actually jealous of all of their access, but it was more than a little bit fun to dump out my old school memorabilia box with them.

The baton is a bonus

Thanks, Mom, for saving it for me. My band infatuation was my training wheels for love – safe practice for when the real experience came along. And thanks to My True Love, Frank, for fulfilling my final Duran Duran dream — Going to a concert!

 

Well, it was almost my final dream. Now if only that great bassist, John Taylor, would follow me back on Twitter. It’s @SensibleMoms. Just sayin’.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Print Friendly, PDF & Email
Share it real good . . .
Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterPin on PinterestShare on Google+Share on StumbleUponShare on RedditEmail this to someonePrint this page

Comments

comments

83 thoughts on “Boy Bands Are For Cougars Too

  1. Farrah

    While I cannot say that I am a fan of ‘1D’ I do have to admit that a New Kids On The Block concert may have been one of my first concert going experiences.

    I’m sending this to my friend Michelle- as I think she is the ultimate DD fan and may have to beat you up for thinking you are a bigger fan than her.

    Reply
  2. Michelle P

    This is Farrah’s friend Michelle and I have to say that I am the biggest Duran Duran fan in the whole world. I could’ve written this piece word for word. I was a preteen when they hit the charts and collected just about every article ever written about and photo ever taken of them. A friend of mine and I forced her mom to take us to a concert in the 80s and I almost needed a paramedic to revive me. I taped Blue Silver, the concert documentary, off of HBO and wore the tape out watching it over and over again. I even bought it on DVD not so long ago and watched it with nostalgic tears. I was in the Simon camp – Andy was the weird one, Roger was quiet, Nick didn’t do it for me, and John was hot but Simon, ooh la la. My thirteen year old self was convinced I’d marry him. I am BY FAR the biggest DD fan you’ll ever meet – still.

    I also will admit being sucked in by 1D. I play them in my car when no one is listening and I cannot get “What Makes You Beautiful” out of my head. It is a pervasive ear worm!

    Reply
    1. The Sisterhood Post author

      I am going to break your heart with my sob story. I had a ticket to go see Duran Duran when I was in 7th grade, but my mom WOULDN’T LET ME GO! Excuse me while I go order Blue Silver on Amazon to dry my tears. Ellen

      Reply
      1. Michelle P

        That is just grounds for emancipation. The Duran Duran concert is one of my fondest memories from that time in my life!

        Reply
    2. Jill

      Michelle, I’m gonna have to say that while I could have written your comment myself, I think that I am the biggest Duran Duran fan! My three year old daughter is named….wait for it….Rio!! I picked it when I was 14 and she was born when I was 40 after already having three boys. I waited a long, long time for that!! 🙂 Baby number 5 is due in March….can I come up with another one?

      My favorite is John so you can have Simon and we’ll call it fair!

      Ellen, thank you for posting that delicious picture of John. Made my day! I would have divorced my parents if they had kept me from going to that concert. I highly recommend you see them on their next tour. They are better than ever!! Still hot after all these years!

      Reply
  3. Kim@Co-Pilot Mom

    I love One Direction’s ‘What Makes You Beautiful’ – I am instantly singing along whenever I hear it.

    I, too, was a total Duran Duran fan. Your story about Friday Night Videos? I totally did that, too! 🙂
    Kim@Co-Pilot Mom recently posted..One Ping OnlyMy Profile

    Reply
  4. Teri

    Search my blog using keyword Duran Duran and you will find yourself buried in my love for them AND my own spawn’s love for 1D. Tickets to 1D? Sure already bought them for NEXT FREAKING JULY’S show in Hershey.

    Oh and by the way, I was AT that Duran Duran show at the Spectrum in row 9. Can’t remember what section but how funny would it be if we were close to each other??

    And as an added twist of strange fate, I’m sitting at my desk listening to First Wave on Sirius XM and the 12″ version of Rio is currently playing?

    Coincidence? I think not.

    Sharing this with all my Duranie friends. 🙂
    Teri recently posted..Ode to a RunnerMy Profile

    Reply
    1. The Sisterhood Post author

      It is not coincidence Duranie soul sister! My husband said his favorite part of the show was being surrounded by horny 30 year olds. 🙂

      We do not have tickets to 1D and we are very sad. My daughters did not express the true depth of their love until after the tickets went on sale. Erin’s daughter is getting to go through the forethought of one of her other friends. Sigh.

      Ellen

      Reply
      1. Teri

        We saw 1D when they opened for BTR in April, and it wasn’t until AFTER that that my two fell in love. (and I nearly went deaf). I saw that DD DID tweet to you!!!! Very cool! I’m sure Simon was at the helm of the DD Twitter account this morning. 🙂

        If you want to REALLY excite your kids, keep checking the Ticketbastard site, tickets keep popping up for 1D shows. You just might get lucky!!
        Teri recently posted..Ode to a RunnerMy Profile

        Reply
        1. The Sisterhood Post author

          Thanks! If only we had been at THAT BTR concert. We saw Hot Chelle Rae open for them. It is hard to imagine that 1D was an opening act in April.

          I am faithfully circling the ticketing sites. Fingers crossed 🙂 Ellen

          Reply
          1. Teri

            Hot Chelle Rae opened for BTR when we saw them last summer in Delaware and again at the York County Fair in PA. Both outdoor venues. HCR was AWESOME!!

            When 1D opened for BTR in April it was indoors at the Patriot Center. Loud, ear drum shattering screams from this indoor venue. Note to self, ripped up Food Lion receipts do NOT work well as ear plugs.

            If we knew then about how much we could love 1D as we know NOW how much we DO love 1D we may have brought extra money for shirts. 😉
            Teri recently posted..Ode to a RunnerMy Profile

  5. Elizabeth

    Love this post, Ellen, for mullets sake! And I love 1D…and my kids are too young to know who they are. 🙁 They will be introduced this Christmas though, when Santa brings them (me) one of their CDs.

    Reply
  6. Daily Duranie (Rhonda)

    I know One Direction…thankfully my daughter isn’t into them because it would be like supplying crack to an addict…and the addict is me. 😀 I have hope though, because while my oldest is nearly 16, I still have a 4 year old coming up behind her. I cringe at the idea that I could be going to these boy band concerts and things into my 50’s, but we won’t talk about that. Yet. I reserve the right to future therapy.

    However, if my name doesn’t give me away, my blog certainly should. Not only am I STILL a huge Duran fan, I write a blog. Daily. Yes, you should probably laugh. It’s OK. If I didn’t laugh I’d cry (some days). My best friend (who is not a mom but is a teacher and counts her students as children anyway) and I are writing partners. In addition to the blog we’re writing a book on fandom, using the Duran fan community as a sort of case study. So while I might not be a cougar…exactly….in this particular case….the potential is there, and lets face it, I’m not getting off scott free here. I still go to concerts, I still have favorites, and I write about it every single day!

    I love your blog. It’s written for the “rest” of us. Yay for Duran Duran retweeting it!

    Reply
    1. The Sisterhood Post author

      I CANNOT wait to check out your blog!You have a dedication to writing that I can only hope to achieve. Glad you found my little blog. Good luck on the book because it sounds so interesting.

      And I KNOW you are really celebrating that retweet with me. For a few moments, I was taken back in time to my 13 y/o self. 🙂 Ellen

      Reply
  7. Angela

    Fabulous blog entry! Being a huge Duranie myself – bought all the records and “stuff” I could get my hands on, have seen them in concert 30 times, even have a DD tattoo! – I have actually been looking forward to when my daughter would start getting into something similar. She has with 1D, and while we missed out on tix too (and I can’t afford re-sale tix cuz, geez, I wouldn’t have money for the next DD tour!), and while I find them a little annoying (although probably not nearly as annoying as my mom thought DD was), I am glad my daughter loves music as much as I still do. Cuz we’re just as likely to be singing The Beatles or Led Zeppelin together as we are DD or 1D!

    Reply
    1. The Sisterhood Post author

      Wow, 30 times in concert! Does that technically make you a groupie? You had to do some traveling for that.

      It’s really neat when we can share what was special to us with our kids. Ellen

      Reply
  8. Michelle

    LOVE it! I wrote a post a lot like this one back in April where I, too, shared a little love for 1D , boy bands and of course my 8th-9th grade obsession – DD (link is below if you care). My 17 yr. old is a total 1D fangirl and I have to admit that I love them too. We bought extra tix to next summer’s concert to sell to her friends but I have to say, I’m thinking I’ll be using one! Found this post from Snarkfest’s tweet! http://youremyfavoritetoday.blogspot.com/2012/04/lets-hear-it-for-boys.html

    Reply
    1. The Sisterhood Post author

      The best boy bands are sprinkled liberally with British accents – like cupcakes. That analogy totally worked like your bourbon one, right?

      And because of your admiration for Duran Duran, know that now I not only read your blog, I will read it like a screaming fan girl.

      Ellen

      Reply
  9. deborah l quinn

    I have boys. There is no 1D in our house, but the 12 year old did, with his own money, just buy (download?) the new Taylor Swift album. I don’t know if boys flock to their bands with the same adoration that pre-teen girls flock to theirs…but when I was a pre-teen, my adoration was reserved, not for a boy band, but for Mark Hamill, in the very first ever Star Wars movie. it’s entirely possible that there are long love letters written to him in my journal, circa 1977, when I was 13. I still think we could’ve been very happy together.
    deborah l quinn recently posted..drinks all ’round…My Profile

    Reply
  10. Alison

    Thank you for making sure I’m at least partially updated with pop culture. I did not know who One Direction was. I know, I need to get out more. Or something.

    I was an NKOTB fan. Had a wall of posters. That kept falling on me when I slept, but I just considered it a hug. #CrazyTeen
    Alison recently posted..Sons And DaughtersMy Profile

    Reply
  11. Mary

    I was never into bands as a youth but was more a musical girl. I do remember begging my mom for the Shenandoah record (for those of you that don’t know – Shenandoah is a Civil War musical – great stuff!) But I did have a massive crush on Prince Andrew and wrote him several letters with my picture included (that would seal the deal right – just looking at my geeky 9th grade school pic??!!) I always received a letter back from his office staff on Buckingham stationary explaining what he was up to. It was enough for me and I have saved every letter:)

    Reply
  12. The Dose of Reality

    Oh…I LOVE THIS POST!! 1D baby, absolutely!! You have hit the nail on the head. We are so lucky to have daughters to take away the whiff of creepy cougar. Being at the concerts (or listening to the music) is totally legit!!

    And how much do I love that you were a Duran Duran fan. OMG…I LIVED for them!! I can’t tell you how many hours I stayed up watching MTV hoping for a glimpse of “Hungry Like The Wolf”. I bet I still could recount every single frame of that video from memory. (Ps. John Taylor is still smoking hot to this day.) –Lisa
    The Dose of Reality recently posted..CAPTCHA…I Wanna Punch Ya!My Profile

    Reply
  13. Susi

    Oh, can I ever relate. My 9 year old is in the throws of a 1 D obsession. Harry is her favorite, yes, I know their names! Like mother, like daughter is all I can say… NKOTB started it for me, followed by Take That… by the time Backstreet Boys and N’Sync came along I was too busy with work and college to obsess. Now the cycle is completed!!! 😉
    Susi recently posted..{Focus} on Mom Photo Challenge: November 2012My Profile

    Reply
    1. The Sisterhood Post author

      I have four boys. The 5 year old is asking for 1D tickets for Christmas—no joke!. The others pretend to hate them and secretly know every word of every song. I have caught them singing along. Erin

      Reply
  14. Kate Hall

    OMG. This is an awesome post! I can’t believe those outfits N Sync wore. Ouch. I was reading Tiger Beat and BOP when Duran Duran was popular. I wasn’t a huge, huge fan just a fan, but had friends who were huge, huge fans and I do love their music still. Loved going down memory lane on this one. And the Friday Night Videos! Every Friday night after the football game, I waited for FNV.

    Reply
    1. The Sisterhood Post author

      Their music was and is great. It is a testament to their musical talent that they are still going strong.

      I forgot about watching FNV after the football games. Thanks for reminding me about that little detail from my past. I’m too young for senility. Ellen

      Reply
  15. Katie E

    Hilarious, as always. I have to admit that I’m a little disappointed my girls haven’t gotten more into One Direction. I will say I was probably more obsessed with the Jonas Brothers than they were a few years ago. And I may have carried my New Kids on the Block obsession into old age and forced my girls to go to a concert on their comeback tour with me. It was good for them. I do have a wonderful memory from the first day of school this year – I was driving my middle girl and one of her friends to school and they seemed grumpy, so I rolled down the windows, turned on What Makes You Beautiful (loud) and sang along to force them to smile. And be embarrassed.
    Katie E recently posted..A Perfect Holiday (or Any Time) TreatMy Profile

    Reply
  16. Pingback: Thanksgiving Tribute to Teens | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

  17. Laura P.

    This truly made me smile! I try explaining to my daughter, who is infatuated with Foster the People, Green Day and Katy Perry, that yes, MOM had these kind of obsessions (as it were) and that decorating her wall is great with me!

    After reading John Taylor’s autobiography, I get to relive my teenage years and ‘Sing Blue Silver’!

    Thank you so much for posting this!

    Reply
    1. The Sisterhood Post author

      That’s what this article was truly about, sharing with my daughters. Thanks for getting that.

      I’m waiting for Amazon to ship my copy of the autobiography! Can’t wait! Ellen

      Reply
  18. Elizabeth

    Yep, I could have written pretty much the same thing. I love Duran Duran and have my own box of goodies from the 80s. Loved John’s book and just bought Sing Blue Silver, tried to get my daughter to watch it with me, but she wouldn’t. However you need to replace 1D with Justin Bieber. I was more excited about his Oprah interview last night than my daughter.

    Reply
    1. The Sisterhood Post author

      You know what is a sign of the times? While my daughters do have posters up on their walls, they don’t have boxes of goodies. They have files on the computer. I guess this is the same deal as hard drives replacing shoe boxes full of pictures. Ellen

      Reply
  19. Jolie

    I freaking love this post. It is perfectly fine to be obsessed with One Direction; I mean, they’re hot (even if I am old enough to be any of their mothers). I also grew up the ultimate Duran Duran fan. I not only ordered out of Tiger Beat, I circulated fan books with other fans around the globe (we each wrote a post and mailed it to the next girl on the list, and it went around several times). Now that was “blogging” the old-fashioned way. I still have all my DD albums on vinyl (some of them special imprints direct from Europe and not for sale in the U.S.), and of course I have c.d. copies too. I remember being on spring break in Florida with my parents in 1980s and sitting in their rental car for hours while I conjured up the live broadcast of the Duran Duran concert at Madison Square Garden on a.m. radio. One of my friends in Alabama recorded the entire concert from her radio to cassette tapes and made me copies. I still have them.

    I’m still a huge fan and got to see the band in concert again in recent years. John is still my favorite! Thanks for the laugh and trip down memory lane with your blog.

    Reply
  20. AV

    This is ridiculous. Comparing a real band like Duran Duran or the Beatles to 1D or any other singing group that do not write their own material or play instruments. Duran Duran has been around for 30+ years and has many successful albums and is still going strong. Groups like 1D or NSync should be called “Boy Groups”, not “Boy Bands”. They are just a fad put together by a label to make fast money. They have no longevity. I’m sure Duran Duran cringes being put in an article with these other disposable groups.

    Reply
    1. The Sisterhood Post author

      I’m disappointed that is what you got out of this post. I grouped 1D with boy bands like ‘N Sync. I even gave a nod to the “apples to oranges” nature of comparing the Beatles’ record sales to 1D’s debut album success.

      What I lumped together was my daughters’ infatuation with 1D to my teenage infatuation with Duran Duran. This was a humorous article about being able to relate to my kids. Ellen

      Reply
  21. Sandra C.

    When I was a teenager, it was David Cassidy and Bobby Sherman and in my 20’s it was Duran Duran. I loved them but didn’t want to go to their concert with a bunch of screaming teenagers. So, my husband and I went when Astronaut came out and we had a blast. Everyone was our age, balding, fat and had their kids with them. It was so funny. Playing DD in our house and car got our daughter interested and we took her to her first concert at 9yrs old to the Red Carpet Massacre concert. It was at Marymoore park in Redmond, WA and we snuck up to the stage by the people in chairs and waved and jumped around so Simon would see us. We were mother and daughter groopies. She listens to them constantly, has them on her mp3 player and plays our old CD’s in her room. We all went to the first night of their All You Need is Now tour in Everett, Washington. We are a DD family! Although she does like 1D and I got her a Harry poster for Christmas.

    Reply
  22. Daizhan

    Duran Duran is the best. And I was at that concert with you in 2005!

    You need to get Frank to take you again when they come back to the states. I have seen them 9 times and I don’t get tired of them. And make sure to read John’s new book. It’s quite witty!

    Reply
  23. Elaine M

    I definitely can relate! I have been a huge Duran Duran fan since I was 12 (in 1982). I just saw them in Memphis in Aug. & last year in Chicago. I live in St. Louis but they haven’t been here since 2004 so I have to do some traveling! I still have all my posters, books, albums, etc. Just read John’s(my fave) book & didn’t want it to end. I have a 13 year old daughter who is obsessed with One Direction & I totally understand what she’s going through! They are adorable & I knew I couldn’t be the only mom who really liked watching their videos & listening to their songs. They really do have some good songs & not just the big hits! I am starting to feel sorry for my 5 & 9 year old boys who have to listen to it a little too much! I also tell my daughter that DD aren’t a boy band & they put themselves together, play instruments & write their own songs but she doesn’t like when I say that !!

    Reply
    1. The Sisterhood Post author

      We are living parallel lives! 🙂

      I never point out that 1D is a group manufactured by a record executive. First, who needs to poke their adolescents with that stick? Secondly, those lads seem to be having such a great time and they seem to be so truly grateful that I just can’t criticize.

      Ellen

      Reply
  24. Pingback: 10 Anti-Resolutions For 2013 | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

  25. Roshni

    Wonderful nostalgic post!! I can quite relate to what your girls are going through! For me, besides Duran Duran, it was also Backstreet boys, Boyz II Men, and NKOTB! Of course, I loved the Beatles too! 🙂
    Roshni recently posted..Short and tweet #1My Profile

    Reply
  26. Kathy Radigan

    I loved this post! And I imagine it did take a year to get your hearing back to normal!! I have two boys, one who is a huge Beatles fan so One Direction is somewhat frowned upon, though my daughter loves them so he lets her have a pass!!! Sending love!! xo
    Kathy Radigan recently posted..Being My Teens Mom Not His FriendMy Profile

    Reply
  27. Aunt Karo

    This was a fantastic post. What a good Mom you are for your daughters!!! They are lucky to have you, as I am to have you for my niece (A wonderful woman I Love).

    Reply
  28. Pingback: 5 Gifts That Keep on Giving | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

  29. Pingback: Blooming | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

  30. Pingback: Our Dirty Little Back To School Secret - Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge