Tag Archives: Spring

10 Books For the Sidelines

If your spring looks anything like ours, you would appreciate not just an extra blanket, some stay cool water bottles and another hour in your day, but something to fill those minutes you will inevitably spend waiting by soccer fields or tennis courts. Well, in our experience, a good book will brighten even the soggiest of sidelines. Here are 10 books for the sidelines that you are sure to love! Need a great book to read this spring? These 10 Books for the Sidelines are fast, easy reads you will love from the first page to the last! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

1. The Lake House  by Kate Morton

Spring loves a mystery and this one does not disappoint. After a lovely party at the lake house, the Edevane family’s 11 month old son Theo goes missing. Morton’s page turner takes this pivotal moment in a family’s history and creates something special and utterly unputdownable. Told from two vantage points–2003 London and 1930s Cornwall–this book will have you ignoring kids just to figure out what is happening and where this story will go. As always, Morton’s gift for managing complicated story lines while simultaneously creating well-developed characters will make you grateful for all that extra time you have to read.

2. The Quiet Game  by Greg Iles

A good friend recommended this book calling it a “sexy beast of a read”. If you are anything like me, that alone might make you want to read this book, but if it doesn’t, try this: this is a novel that won’t be compartmentalized. A virtual smorgasbourd of all good things literary, this book has action, suspense, courtroom drama, some literary allusions, and even a tiny sprinkling of horror toward the end. There are no small bites here; you will devour this book. Without a dull moment in sight, this book grips you from the first sentence and keeps you entertained and hungry for more until it delivers one sad reader at the very end. You will miss these characters and this story when it’s gone. Lucky for all of us, this is book one in a five book series. Read on, book warriors!

3. The Widow by Fiona Barton

Don’t read the dust jacket: this book is neither Gone Girl nor The Girl on the Train, both books we really, really liked even with their creepy, psychological suspense. It IS a great read though. In fact, it reminded us more of Leanne Moriarty’s The Husband’s Secret with the marital secrets and the mystery at the heart of it. Sometimes, multiple points of view can be distracting, but in this case, the structure of the novel contributes to some of the magic. Be forewarned: you could easily lose an afternoon falling down this delightful rabbit hole, but the pay-off is worth it!

4. I Am Malala by Malala Yousafazi

Our book club just read this one, and we universally loved and were inspired by it. So much so that those of us who had borrowed it from the library purchased copies to share with our kids. We were mesmerized by Malala’s chilling account of her hometown being taken over and then living under extremist terrorists, moved by her descriptions of the Swat Valley where she grew up, and emboldened by her courage. The book held up for us as a read, not just a recounting. 2016 is The Year for Global Girls. Lose yourself in Malala’ s incredible story and find yourself fired up about getting girls all over the world access to educational opportunities.

5.  Carry On by Rainbow Rowell

 We share a huge author crush on Rainbow Rowell. We both LOVED Eleanor & Park and Fangirl, so we had huge expectations for this book, especially because favorite characters from Fangirl show up again in this story. Well, the inimitable Rowell never fails to surprise, entertain, and stun us with her craft and cleverness. She can also give you that rare stomach flip. Even in a book about magic, she is the real deal. Before you start to call this book Harry Potter for big kids, you have to know that this book is its own brand of special. How do we know? Over 500 pages disappear in a flash before your very eyes. This is Rowell at her best. The results? Magical.

6. Where’d You Go, Bernadette? by Maria Semple

In one sense, you can think of this book as bread crumbs in the forest because essentially that is how this smart novel is written. Bee, the daughter, assembles emails, documents, letters et al after her mother Bernadette disappears in an effort to assemble the clues to unravel the mystery of her mother’s disappearance. The structure of the novel is just one intimation that this book is something special. After you read each document in its entirety, the full force and power of this novel is brought to light. Bitterly funny, satirical, and off-kilter in the best sense of the word, this send-up about all the things we mock and fear and revere in our modern society is the equivalent of a literary carnival. Dork Alert: Fans of Arrested Development won’t be a bit surprised to learn that the author Maria Semple was also a writer for the series .

7. Bird in Hand by Christina Baker Kline

Erin gobbled this one right up. She even took it backpacking on the Appalachian Trail. Nothing says “must read” like a willingness to cart those extra ounces up and down a mountain. In any case, the novel opens as stay-at-home mom Allison’s life is about to go off the rails. She goes to her childhood best friend’s book signing one night and has a little too much to drink. Mere hours later, she is involved in a fatal accident in which a child dies. The air you take into your lungs in the big gasp in the beginning takes this whole well-paced novel to be released. This may not be high literature, but it is a captivating read that makes you think. Like we said, you are gonna want to take big bites of this one.

8. Big Little Lies by Liane Moriarty

Erin laughed, cried, and ignored her kids for three days to finish this piece of book crack in the big, sloppy gulps it demands. You know from the beginning that there has been a terrible tragedy at the local school’s Trivia Night, because Moriarty leaves little crumbs at the end of each chapter. But that’s not the story here. This is NOT another legal thriller. A big, sprawling character study of modern moms, it may be. An ironic, funny take on modern parenting, it definitely is! It’s also a rollicking good time. You’ll laugh and cringe at just how right Moriarty gets all the characters hanging out in the school parking lot. A great read for fall while still reminiscent of that last joyful moment of summer indulgence.

9. Unbecoming: A Novel by Rebecca Sherm

A book lover’s dream, this first novel has the trifecta for a satisfying read: great well-developed characters, a dynamic and well-paced plot, and some nice curve balls to keep you guessing. Our protagonist Grace looks like a simple girl from Tennessee, but she can’t hide her complex and slippery character for long. You’ll root for her and want to wring her neck in equal measure.  There’s a question that hangs over the novel from the beginning that’s begging to be answered and when Scherm finally gets around to it, you are grateful for the care she took in the build-up as well as the payoff itself. This is a debut that leaves you wanting more.

10. Everything I Never Told You by Celeste Ng

Moms of daughters, beware: this read will make you want to lock your girls up and throw away the key. But despite the dark cloud that hangs over this novel as a teen girl goes missing, there is so much to enjoy as well. Ng is a writer’s writer and she doesn’t so much document this family’s unraveling as their personal hell unfolds as invite you to pull at the fraying threads with her. At once, a novel about family, the mother/daughter dynamic, and cultural divides, this book is also achingly real and familiar. The truth hurts so bad in this one, but the reader is so grateful for every perfect note Ng hits. If the ship is going down, we might as well learn something from the trip. Ng makes sure she plumbs the depths so well that this is one dark corner now revealed.

We hope these page turners will brighten your spring!

Happy Reading!

Erin and Ellen

This post contains Amazon affiliate links, so we get a little compensation for all of our book love.
We just reinvest in books, so don’t get too jealous.

You can follow us on Google+, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.

Check out our books, “I Just Want to Be Alone” and “You Have Lipstick on Your Teeth.”

Have every post delivered to your inbox! You can opt out at any time, but you won’t want to.

Enter your email address:

 

Share it real good . . .
Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterPin on PinterestShare on Google+Share on StumbleUponShare on RedditEmail this to someonePrint this page

Arbitrary Battle Lines: You Willing to Die on The Bikini Sword?

Confetti Canons, Bratz dolls, and bikinis, oh my! This is not a case of Spring Break gone wrong, but one of a simple question launching a great discussion. Last week, Spring looked like it was actually thinking about showing up this year so we asked a simple question on our Facebook page.

Ask a simple question and this is what you get---Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

And oh the response we got! It was great, and, better yet, it prompted a discussion not just on our page but between the two of us too.

In this week’s podcast, we take on the burning question of the bikinis but also talk about respectful parenting, moms judging other moms, our confetti canon culture, and arbitrary battle lines. Erin shares a major misstep along the way and a story of one of her friends who got it just right. There’s a lot of good stuff in this one.

Just click the player at the bottom of the post.

Be careful where you draw your line in the sand in parenting: a new podcast from Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

You can find all of our podcasts here.

You can follow us on Google+, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.

Check out our books, “I Just Want to Be Alone” and “You Have Lipstick on Your Teeth.”

Have every post delivered to your inbox! You can opt out at any time, but you won’t want to.

Enter your email address:

Click here to listen to our latest Soundbite!

Share it real good . . .
Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterPin on PinterestShare on Google+Share on StumbleUponShare on RedditEmail this to someonePrint this page

One Simple Step to Creating A Lasting Easter Memory

Ah, sweet family memories are the golden egg we’re all chasing, no? Fess up, we’ve seen your Pinterest boards. Wanna make certain that this year’s bunny bonanza is forever imprinted on your family’s memory? Well, peel back the foil on that Cadbury and get comfy because we have one simple step to creating a lasting Easter memory. This is one from the Dymowski family vault.

Want to create a lasting holiday memory with your kids? Just add virus--Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

 

Spring Break may look a little different once you’ve traded bikinis for, well, Pittsburgh, but we had high expectations for album-worthy memories despite the less than exotic locale. My sister had a new job, a new baby, and a new town, and we were descending upon her young family and new abode en masse for some hard-core sight-seeing and family bonding. I was already mentally planning the page layouts for my Shutterfly album before we had even unloaded. Fate laughs in the face of such hubris. All of this enthusiastic anticipation could only mean one thing: this minivan was about to go down in flames and spectacularly so.

PittsburghCollage

Ahh, the pretty pictures before the hammer of fate cracked this trip wide open.

We had exactly one picture-perfect day before trouble started brewing on Friday night. The youngest started vomiting like it was his job.  There is no faster way to become persona non grata in someone’s home than to start chewing through their linens. It’s all fun and games until someone needs a bucket. Or three.

My sister looked torn. On the one hand, my sister was super-excited to have us visit. Furthermore, she was deeply worried about my youngest boy who currently seemed possessed by some horrible demon. On the other hand, we had just dropped Patient Zero in the middle of her lovely new home and he was spewing viral missiles far and wide. I could see her mind click through her options: Grab her own child à la Sally Field in “Not Without My Daughter,” kick mine to the curb, or re-create a scene from Outbreak complete with isolation tents and masks.

My sister may or may not have been thinking this!

Too much? You weren’t there. It wasn’t much of a stretch.

Um, we started packing.

In the beginning, I was harboring a fantasy that the exorcism coming from my child really was the result of his excitement and high fructose red no. 49 jellybeans. In fact, I was packaging this spin for my sister and her husband, Dan, when Victim 2 fell. And hard. The siege was underway, but we did what any good soldiers would do, we left to protect the others.

Pittsburgh is about five horrible, evil, ugly hours from home when you’re under attack. Within a mere 12 hours, the viral marauders had taken down three family members and cut a swath of destruction along the Pennsylvania turnpike and its rest stops that inspired awe, panic, and a desperate yearning for bleach and hand sanitizer. I’m going to spare you the details, but leave you with this image: Steve pulled the car into the driveway after a looooooooong drive on the Puking Parkway from Pittsburgh and promptly tossed his cookies on the front lawn. This was Saturday night. Easter morning was less than a day away. We were already in the midst of an unholy mess when the other three kids started dropping like flies.

What’s a woman to do in the face of an outbreak that might make an epidemiologist’s palms sweat? Don a Hazmat suit? Grab a quarantine sign and some yellow tape? Wave a white flag? Hellz no, I started wrapping and assembling Easter baskets. It was me against the clock. Just as I nestled that last chocolate egg into its basket, I succumbed too.

Dawn rose that Easter morning with two parents completely incapacitated, but with kids who still believed in a candy-toting Bunny who would brave our viral hell to deliver the goods. In between prayers to the porcelain god, we were sending up hopes for an Easter miracle. We got one.

Ace (12), who not 6 hours earlier had been wrapped around a toilet bowl, had regained his usual pep. This meant one thing: he was getting a huge promotion complete with bunny ears, baskets full of candy, and full-on bragging rights. I felt a little like a stage mom pushing my baby into the spotlight, “You can do it, honey! Just think positive thoughts” but frankly, I was too sick to move so it was probably more like gesturing and mumbling.

No childhood innocence was lost in the making of this memory. At least, I hope not. I actually have no recollection of that day, but Ace even took pictures. It happened.

more plaguemustacheborder

Is this not the most pathetic looking child you have ever seen?

The virus took down my sister’s whole family viciously within hours of our hasty retreat. Dan still uses The Great Pittsburgh Easter Plague as the yardstick to measure all other illnesses. In fact, he was completely unsympathetic when another virus took us all down the next year.

But I did get my fond family Easter memory after all even if it was not Pinterest album-worthy. Mostly because Dan won’t let me forget it.

-Erin

 

You can follow us on Google+, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.

Check out our books, “I Just Want to Be Alone” and “You Have Lipstick on Your Teeth.”

Have every post delivered to your inbox! You can opt out at any time, but you won’t want to.

Enter your email address:
Share it real good . . .
Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterPin on PinterestShare on Google+Share on StumbleUponShare on RedditEmail this to someonePrint this page

7 Ways You Can Make Your Spring A Little Less Frenzied

They say there are two sides to every story. Well, the flip side to Spring’s sunny warmth and beauty is its fickle weather and jam-packed calendar. Between the First Communions, graduations, baby showers, and end-of-year events, it’s enough to make you wistful for the days of long underwear and parkas again or maybe that’s just us.

Well, snap out of it, people!  You don’t need an arctic blast from the not-too-distant past; you need a plan. There are lots of ways to wrestle Spring down to a size that’s manageable again or at least stop wanting to fling it from an overpass. Here are 7 ways you can make your spring a little less frenzied . . .

Got a jam-packed spring? "Make" some time with these 7 ways to make it less frenzied--Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

 

1. Make your crockpot your friend.

Whether cooking for a crowd or just trying to avoid the drive-thru lane every night for dinner, our trusty crockpots make dinner happen even in the midst of a busy night. To make your life even easier, we’ve got some favorites and we’re not afraid to share ’em.  Every one of these recipes come approved by both of our families.

If you don’t currently own one, we recommend at least a 6 quart crockpot for a family of four or larger with a removable, easy to clean insert. It should also be programmable to really make your life easier. This slow cooker by Hamilton Beach checks all the boxes and has a good price point to match.

7 Ways to Make Your Spring a Little Less Frenzied has to include your crockpot.

 

2. Grab a buddy.

Nothing is more valuable than your carpooling peeps during these busy months. We lay out how to find a fabulous posse and how to keep from becoming persona non grata in the neighborhood, but just know that you will treasure these folks beyond measure for making your life work week in and week out.

Need to make your spring a little less frenzied? Grab a posse and 6 other great ideas from Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

3. Be prepared.

Channel your inner Boy Scout. We have said it before that Spring is a two-faced mean girl. Warm and inviting one minute, cold and blustery the next, Spring can be hell on your wardrobe. The key is to have what you need when you need it. Dymowskis keep a bin in the back of the van with extra sweatshirts and t-shirts. And socks. Lots of socks. Hmmm, maybe that’s where all the mates have gone.

4. Keep it simple.

Pare it down. Spring steals time like a sneak. If you want any time at all to smell the flowers, now is the time to lock down your extra commitments. Never forget if you have school-aged kids, that spring is the heyday for all the events. With a calendar packed with field days, band concerts, spring dances, and end of year celebrations, you will barely have time to breathe, so steer clear of the lady with the clipboard begging for your help. Even if it’s Erin.

5. Pray for rain.

No, seriously. When Mother Nature throws you a blessed night off, take that gift and run with it. Dust off that dining table and have a meal together. Pull out the cards. Watch a show together. Take a moment to just be the special thing that is your family. You’ll be happy that you did.

6. Plan a trip.

Nothing like thinking about all the fun things you are gonna do when you take a break from your everyday life to make the slogging, flogging, calendar-clogging Spring days feel a little less harried.

Need to make your spring a little less harried? Plan a trip and 6 other ideas from Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

Yes, please.

 7. Take a hike.

Literally or metaphorically, this one works on many levels. Whether you are just taking a break from some of the things on your to-do list or actually hitting a trail, you’ll be grateful for the fresh air, change of scenery, and chance for a little time together.

Need to make your spring a little less frenzied? Take a hike and 6 other ways to relax this spring---Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

See? Hope really does spring eternal. Here’s to warmer weather and time to enjoy it!

-Erin and Ellen

This post contains Amazon affiliate links because we don’t just really like crockpots but food to put in them.
You can follow us on Google+, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.

Check out our books, “I Just Want to Be Alone” and “You Have Lipstick on Your Teeth.”

Have every post delivered to your inbox! You can opt out at any time, but you won’t want to.

Enter your email address:
Share it real good . . .
Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterPin on PinterestShare on Google+Share on StumbleUponShare on RedditEmail this to someonePrint this page

5 Reasons Youth Sports Are Worth the Time, Sweat and Price Tag

First, you must know that we, Ellen and Erin, are all in when it comes to kids and sports . . .

Erin: But as I look at the open tabs on my computer right now, my heart clenches. They are all related to youth sports. My clan of five has two track and field runners, two soccer players, and a swimmer this season. My wallet and my calendar cringe.

Ellen: You know what’s cringeworthy? I saw a billboard advertising for Little League starting at age four! Age four?  If you have to struggle to get him on the potty, why would you sacrifice your Saturday mornings to see him run the wrong direction around the bases? Why are we starting so young?

5 Reasons Youth Sports Are Worth the Time, Sweat, and Price Tag | Parenting | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

I’m pretty sure we’re facing the right way.

Erin: Seriously. You need to pace yourselves for when this mess gets real with travel teams . . .

Ellen: Once again—why, oh why? What is wrong with just playing in your backyard? In your own county? In your own time zone?

Erin: Because this merry bandwagon is a bundle of fun. . . at first.

In the beginning, you’re a little heady about the deep ores of awesome they are mining on these special teams. But that’s before the toxic vapors hit you, and you realize what a gas-guzzling, time-sucking, money-grabbing endeavor the travel team can be.

Wait! Didn’t you just pole vault onto this bandwagon by signing Coco (14) up for a travel volleyball team? If you’ve avoided them this long, why start now?

Ellen:  It sure as heck isn’t because we think she’s going to the Olympics. We don’t even own those rose-colored goggles.

Nothing says "Vacation" like a three day tournament 75 miles from your house.

Nothing says “vacation” like a three day tournament 75 miles from your house.

Erin: In your defense, your girl entered high school, and she was a swimmer without a swim team. She wasn’t going to leave high school without a varsity letter, so she kicked off her flippers and picked up that volleyball. Too bad she didn’t think of that before ninth grade, but the travel team is providing a great crash course.

Ellen: I guess if we had started her at age four, we wouldn’t be in this predicament. My bad.

But let’s get back to those rose-colored glasses. Can we all just calm the heck down and stop thinking we have the next Michael Phelps/Mia Hamm/Peyton Manning eating their Cheerios at our tables?

Erin: Now, to be fair, SOMEWHERE,  SOMEONE has the next superstar throwing his dirty socks on her floor, but sitting on the sidelines, you would think they’re all headed to the big leagues.

Ellen: Or a Division I college.

Erin: Well, let’s talk about college. Many parents jump on this travel team hamster wheel dreaming of the big payout when college rolls around.

Ellen: But college athletics is not the pot o’ gold it’s made out to be. The odds of a high school athlete getting a sports scholarship is only 2%. But this is just talking about getting SOME money. The odds of getting a full-ride are far worse.

So if sports is not the get-into-college-free card of our dreams, why do it at all? The crazy schedules, the extra laundry, and the endless loops to soccer fields and swimming pools don’t make a compelling argument. But here are five reasons sports are more than worthwhile.

5 Reasons Youth Sports Are Worth the Time, Sweat, and Price Tag | Parenting | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

Sports gives them . . .

1.  A place to fail.

You have to fail to succeed.

You have to fail to succeed.

Who wants to raise losers? We do!

Michael Jordan said it best: “I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

Erin: I want my kids to be like Mike. Resilient adults bounce back from this thing we call life with humor and grace. We want our Bumbles to bounce when life knocks them to the ground. So we want them to have plenty of practice with how it feels to fall and fail and get back up again.

Ellen: And speaking of practice, sports provides the proof positive that failure is not the worst thing that can happen. In sports, the more you fail, the better you get. Just ask Michael Jordan or any kid who has tried to get a volleyball over the net.

 

2. A place to shine.

teamtunnel

Shine, Baby, Shine.

Erin: Every kid deserves a moment to feel how good it feels to be good at something. As moms, we love to see our kids show the world just how special they are. But sports helps them feel good even if they are not THAT good at it. Even as the world’s worst baseball player on a team that makes the Bad News Bears look like a hotbed of talent, a kid can still have his moment. I know. I was that Bad News Bear. I still remember that moment.

Ellen: It comes down to this: if you could spoon-feed your child high self-esteem, we would all be serving it, but that’s not quite how this parenting thing works.

Sports gives them a steady diet of opportunities instead. Each skill mastered, each hour logged, each competency checked off is feeding the image they have of themselves until they emerge on the other side of childhood with a healthy self-worth in place.

 

3.  A place to feel the pressure.

Pressure: making diamonds for million of years.

Pressure: making diamonds for million of years.

Erin:  Is this off-limits to say? We’re not Tiger Moms here, but we love that sports forces our kids to bring their A-game every once in a while. My husband says all the time that he loves nothing more than watching his kids out there, seeing them stretch themselves to their limits.

Ellen: Whether you are stepping up to that line, climbing up on the blocks or winding up on the mound, when you have all eyes on you, you’ve got to bring it. Sports teaches you to get out of your head, focus on the essentials, and, to borrow from swimming, “swim in your own lane.”

Erin: Good Lord, sports clichés exist, because they are spot on!

 

4. A place to feel the glory.

Reaping the rewards.

Reaping the rewards.

Ellen: And speaking of cliches, can we talk about the thrill of victory?? Everyone should get to feel that euphoria that comes from pushing yourself and succeeding.

Erin: We know there is a movement against participation trophies and we are standing here with nodding heads and fistbumps, but a real trophy? Earned with hard work and practice? Well, nothing feels better than that.

5. A place to belong.

Where everybody knows your name.

Where everybody knows your name.

Erin: Yeah, we know there are technically “team sports” and “individual sports”, but in our experience, you do them all with a buddy. Or 50. We are strong advocates for not having “all of your friends in one basket.”

Ellen: Nothing gives your child another group of friends to turn to quite like a sports team. Hanging around a pool deck for three or seventy hours waiting for your event gives you plenty of time to socialize. Nothing bonds friends like sharing a bag of soggy Doritos in between races.

Erin: For my oldest, because he was entering a high school where he didn’t really know anyone, the soccer team was the key to his feeling comfortable. The team gave him an easy entry into the social scene.

Ellen: Get ready because I’m about to lay down another cliché—There is no “I” in team. The world really would be a better place if people could learn to cooperate better.

It Really Is All Worthwhile

Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms Sports Are Worthwhile

Follow_us_on_Pinterest_pic

You can follow us on Google+, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.

Check out our books, “I Just Want to Be Alone” and “You Have Lipstick on Your Teeth.”

 

Enter your email address:Delivered by FeedBurner

 

 

Share it real good . . .
Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterPin on PinterestShare on Google+Share on StumbleUponShare on RedditEmail this to someonePrint this page

May Finding the Funny and a Tribute to Mom Taxis!

It’s the beginning of the month and that means it’s Finding the Funny time! But this new month is May, so it’s honor all the mothers time, too! Well, here at The Sisterhood you can have it all.

Enjoy our tribute to The Mom Taxi Command Central, then link up your funny to share.

This pretty much captures it. Good ahead, click on it to really appreciate the accuracy.

Go ahead, click on it to really appreciate the accuracy.

 

Welcome to May’s Finding the Funny!

Meet the Hosts

Anna @ My Life and Kids

Kelley @ Kelley’s Break Room

Robyn @ Hollow Tree Ventures

Kerry @ HouseTalkN

Julie @ I Like Beer and Babies

Keesha @ Mom’s New Stage

Meredith @ The Mom of the Year

Anna @ Random Handprints

Ellen and Erin @ Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

Toulouse @ Toulouse and Tonic

The Rules

Link up an old or new funny post. Link up as many times as you want (we’re serious.)

The party is open until Friday at midnight. The earlier you link up, the more clicks you’ll get.

Click around and meet the other funny bloggers that are linking up.

Follow the Finding the Funny Pinterest board. We’ll all be pinning our favorites throughout the month.

We don’t ask you to link back to us or include a button on your blog, but we do ask you to send out a tweet or post about the party on your Facebook page. Be sure to use #findingthefunny.



Share it real good . . .
Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterPin on PinterestShare on Google+Share on StumbleUponShare on RedditEmail this to someonePrint this page

10 Reasons March Makes Us Stabby

Spring has clearly missed the on-ramp this year. Why are we still getting snowed in, on, and around??

Erin: March is in like a lion, out like a lamb, and all that. 

Ellen: Well, I’m ready for some lamb chops. It’s been especially brutal this year.

Erin: Grrr! It makes me stabby. Like Brutus.

Ellen: Nice Ides of March reference.

Erin: I guess we could take comfort that we’re not having as bad a March as Caesar did. There’s that.

Ellen: Et tu, Brute? Let’s swing this shamrock back to the 21st century.

10 Reasons March Makes Us Stabby

 

1)  Chores Multiply Exponentially

March dials it up a notch.  Now in addition to the massive amount of spring cleaning inside, it’s time to cut back the bushes and clear the detritus from the flowerbeds outside too. We could probably hear March maniacally laughing, but in this thirty degree weather we’re wearing earmuffs to pull weeds. Probably best to just leave it for the kids to do during summer break anyway.

2) Schizoid Wardrobe

Oh March, you are one wild and crazy girl! One day we have to pile on the sweaters and the next we’re looking for a tank top. And footwear? Fuggedaboutit! Can you please just let us pack away the snow pants and mittens? We call mercy!

3) Hokey Holidays

St. Patty’s Day?  Who is this holiday really for? Preschoolers and college kids, that’s who. If you’re not making glittered shamrocks or guzzling whiskey and green beer, what’s really the point? Besides, true Irish girls drink whiskey every day of the year. Or so we’ve heard.

4) It’s cold

That damn groundhog is on our hit list. Brrrrrrrr. Everyone is cold, cranky, and stabby. We are over these blocks of ice we call feet. Truly.

Source: wqad.com via Sisterhood on Pinterest

 

5) Calendar Clustermuck

Winter sports are not over and spring sports have already begun. Have you seen our complicated calendars?? You’re hitting us where it hurts, March. We are not happy and we’re taking names.

6) Early Easter

We don’t mind wearing sweaters over our Easter best, but we would rather not have to don the old parkas too. Who wants an Easter picture where the kids look like they’re hitting the slopes instead of hunting for eggs?

7) Daylight Savings Time Blues

Our more seasoned internal clocks don’t spring forward like they used to. We can’t fall asleep an hour early that first night, and it’s all downhill from there. By the end of the week, we’re the crazy ladies in the supermarket talking to our tomatoes. And our kids? Shudder.

8) Confused Cart

When you have de-icer and grass seed snuggled together in your cart, even the checkout girl at Home Depot knows you’ve got problems.

9) The Dreadmill

Running on a treadmill in a gym is about as fun as . . . well, as fun as being jerked around by March and her fickle, fickle ways.

10) Did we mention we’re cold??

And so over it. Summer is our time to shine. Bring on the flip-flops, please. Or, at the very least, lose the freezing temps.

But it’s not all moaning and groaning, there is one thing we both LOVE about March:

March Madness

The drama, the brackets, the Cinderella stories, we love it all! But like the rest of March, it comes with a punch.

And this year has been no exception. If your brackets aren’t already in the recycling bin like ours, we need to talk, because you clearly have some connections we might find useful.

 

Source: heavy.com via Sisterhood on Pinterest

Here’s hoping Spring weather truly is right around the corner.

Please don’t fool us April.

 

 

Click the link to read some other great posts over at  Monday Listicles!

 

 

 

Share it real good . . .
Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterPin on PinterestShare on Google+Share on StumbleUponShare on RedditEmail this to someonePrint this page

The Year The Easter Bunny Needed A Hazmat Suit

In the beginning,  our trip to Pittsburgh to visit family was shaping up to  be a lovely moment on the timeline of our lives. My sister, Karen, had finally moved within a distance we could drive on a single tank of gas. She had a new job, a new baby, and a new house under contract. So my husband, Steve, and I loaded up the minivan with our crew of five and pointed her west.  Spring Break looks a little different once you’ve traded bikinis for, well, Pittsburgh, but we had high expectations for album-worthy memories on this trip. Which meant there was only way it could go: down in flames. And spectacularly so.

PittsburghCollage

Fate laughs in the face of such hubris.

Trouble started brewing on Friday night, when Eddie (2) started vomiting.  There is no faster way to become persona non grata in someone’s home than to start chewing through their linens.  My poor sister had been a mom for about 10 minutes, but she was torn. It’s all fun and games until someone needs a bucket.

We had just dropped Patient Zero in the middle of her lovely new home. I could see her mind click through her options: Grab her own child a la Sally Field in “Not Without My Daughter”, kick mine to the curb, or re-create a scene from Outbreak complete with tenting and masks.

My sister may or may not have been thinking this!

My sister may or may not have been thinking this!

 

Um, we started packing.

At this point, I was harboring a fantasy that the exorcism coming from my child really was the result of his licking the bathroom floor at the rest stop as Charlie (8) suggested. I was packaging this spin for my sister and her husband, Dan, when Victim 2 fell. And hard. The siege was underway.

Pittsburgh is about five horrible, evil, ugly hours from home when you’re under attack. I’m gonna spare you the details, but leave you with this image: Steve pulled the car into the driveway after a looooooooong drive on the Puking Parkway from Pittsburgh and promptly tossed his cookies on the front lawn. Where’s a white flag when you really need one??

This was Saturday night. Easter morning was a mere 6 hours away. So in addition to Eddie, Ace (12) was down, Steve was down, and the other three kids were dropping like flies. We could have used a quarantine sign and some yellow tape.

What did this seemingly sane woman do then? Start wrapping and assembling Easter baskets. It was me against the clock. But much like the scene with Steve hours before, I succumbed right about the time I nestled the last chocolate egg in its basket.

Dawn rose on a day with two parents completely incapacitated.  It was not looking good for an Easter miracle, but thank every lucky star in the sky for the resilience of boys when candy is on the line!  Ace (12) who not 6 hours earlier had been wrapped around a toilet bowl had regained his usual step. He had no idea what I had in store for him.

Bottom Line: Sonny Boy got a huge promotion, complete with bunny ears and bragging rights. I felt like a stage mom pushing my baby into the spotlight, “You can do it, honey! Just think positive thoughts.” To be frank, I was too sick to move so it was more like gesturing and mumbling, but, whatever, he was my Chosen One.

No childhood innocence was lost in the making of this memory. At least, I hope not. I actually have no recollection of that day, but Ace even took pictures. It happened.

more plaguemustacheborder

Is this not the most pathetic looking child you have ever seen?

 

Postscript: The virus took down my sister’s whole family viciously within hours of our hasty retreat. Dan still uses The Great Pittsburgh Easter Plague as the yardstick to measure all other illnesses. In fact, he was completely unsympathetic when another virus took us all down last year.

And I did get my album-worthy memory after all. Mostly because Dan won’t let me forget it.

-Erin

 

 

Posted by Ellen Williams  Erin Dymowski
 

Follow my blog with Bloglovin

Share it real good . . .
Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterPin on PinterestShare on Google+Share on StumbleUponShare on RedditEmail this to someonePrint this page

Facebook Follow-Up Friday #5

Because Facebook doesn’t show all of our followers all of the awesomeness all of the time we have . . .

This week we were all about Spring and St. Patrick’s Day!

We Shared Spring Cleaning Tips:

spring cleaning Facebook Friday

 

Then We Set Out To See Just HOW Organizationally Invested Our Followers Really Are:

They are out of order, there are random scrap paper bookmarks, and there is a gardening book mingling amongst them!

Ellen’s bookshelf: They are out of order, there are random scrap paper bookmarks, and there is a gardening book mingling amongst them! Mwahahaha!

OCD Facebook

See all of the responses here.

 

A St. Patrick’s Day Public Service Announcement:

a a stpatricksday

Erin’s Irish Roots Recipe:

Grandma Peg’s Irish Soda Bread

Erin: This is our family’s favorite Irish tradition. Beats corned beef and cabbage by a mile. Everyone is happy my mom makes about 20 loaves each year.

Irish soda Bread

Leprechaun Trap:

We don’t know about you, but the leprechauns invade our homes every St. Patrick’s Day creating mayhem and mischief. It sure would be nice to capture the little buggers once and for all.

Posts to Catch Up On Once You’ve Caught Those Pesky Leprechauns:

March Through the Pintershit of Ugly Sweaters

We’re more than ready to put away the woolies for another year. To pass the time before we can pack our winter garb away in our cedar chests for another season, we found some sweaters on Pinterest that deserve to be packed away forever . . . at the bottom of the landfill. Check out the latest addition in our Pintershit series.

5 Reasons Youth Sports Are Worth The Time, Sweat and Price Tag

If sports is not the get-into-college-free card of our dreams, why do it at all? The crazy schedules, the extra laundry, and the endless loops to soccer fields and swimming pools do not make a compelling argument. We share five reasons why sports are more than worthwhile.

5 Reasons Youth Sports Are Worth The Time Sweat and Price Tag

Mattel Easter Toy Basket Giveaway! Save the Bunny!

For the full explanation, check out the post. For the short version, just have at the Rafflecopter entry form below.
a Rafflecopter giveaway

 

You Really Liked Ellen’s Little eCard She Made All By Herself:

It’s been a hard winter, yo.

accurate

 

We Share Some Sensible Advice:

It IS that time of year when hibernation is ending. Be safe, friends.

bearrun

This May Not Follow The Spring Theme We’re Laying Down, But Funny Is Funny:

catscary

And Finally, THANKS To All of You Who Follow Us on Facebook!

Panda

Not Following Us Yet? Just Click Here and You Can Take a Turn at Cleaning Out the Panda Cage Too.

 

 

Share it real good . . .
Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterPin on PinterestShare on Google+Share on StumbleUponShare on RedditEmail this to someonePrint this page