Tag Archives: summer

I Sent My Son Away and I Don’t Regret It One Bit

I sent my son away for the summer, and I don’t regret it one bit. While not a revelation on the level of my Andy Griffith aversion, this truth did generate a little buzz beside the pool among my friends.

“I don’t know how you do it, Erin.”

“You know I could never do that either.”

“But I would just miss my kids so much.”

Insert record scratch here.  Say, WHAT? Parenting teens can be challenging, especially over the unstructured summer months. Camps, trips, or even extended vacations might be just what the family ordered | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms Ladies, not only could you, but you may even actually want to. Now, I feel like I should back the story up a bit. I did not ship my fifteen year old off to grandma’s house for the summer, although I’m not taking that one off the table. He wasn’t getting scared straight at boot camp or on a grand tour of Europe either, although any of these options do sound lovely depending on which version of himself he’s sharing with me that day. In fact, I could say in all honesty that I didn’t really do anything. He came to me and asked to work at a local camp on the Chesapeake Bay.

For full disclosure, my older son worked there for the past three summers. So we knew very well what he, and the rest of us, were getting ourselves into. But that didn’t make it a certainty that this boy should go. Working at camp meant that he would only be home for 24 hours every week. This is a huge ouch for a Momma who likes all of her chicks in her nest. Also, because we used his vacation time for the family wedding in Cancun, he wouldn’t have time for any of our other summer family traditions, including our special visit with our friends from Maine that we have been doing for the last 15 years. The home team would be a man down in making all the memories this summer. Oh, and the son who was usually at camp would be home from college, so that was another factor to consider.

Sigh. My summers really aren’t what they used to be.

However, weighed against some of the larger pluses, I swallowed all of my reservations, hesitations, and selfish motivations, and gave him (along with Steve) the parental blessing. Then I packed the old raggedy sheets, the second string towels, and enough bug spray and suntan lotion to marinate him nicely all summer long. Before I knew it, there were no more tasks to distract me and the day came to say good-bye for the summer. We dropped him off to live like one of the lost boys all summer long. If there was a tear in my eye, I’ll deny it.

While I am certainly a woman who can work herself into a fine emotional lather (see exhibits A, B, and C from the year before I sent my oldest son to college), and there is no tin heart here, the truth is that while I did miss him, I didn’t miss him as much as I thought I would. My recent practice learning a new normal  certainly made this transition easier, I know. The truth was that he was happy, so I was happy. But, and this is the dirty little secret that got my friends talking, it was an awesome summer for all of us, even, maybe even especially, with him gone.

From my son’s point of view, camp was always a no-brainer-all-good thing. He wasn’t moving away so much as towards something after all. Certainly, from our point of view, he dipped his toe in the waters of independence and found the water just fine. By working his way through real responsibilities with real consequences, he gained a confidence that we couldn’t have given him any other way. Sure, he worked through scheduling conflicts, personnel issues, and the daily challenges that arise in any job, but it was all in a cocoon of safety. He had the directors, his slightly older peers, and the Boy Scouts of America supporting him too. Besides, I was only twenty minutes away if he really needed me.

But if he wasn’t really cutting the cord this past summer, he wasn’t really holding on to it either. While he told us about those times when things didn’t go as planned, when scouters were uncooperative, or when his fellow counselors let him down, it was always after the fact. The storms that swelled and gathered on his shores this summer both literally and figuratively, well, he found a way to weather them. While not exactly sailing his own ship or charting his own course just yet, he was definitely adjusting sails and battening down hatches all by himself.

But the larger story of his summer was that the camp staff became another family for him and a home away from home. Even seeing my son in a different context than we do, they loved him all the same. This did my Momma heart a world of good. Don’t we all in the end just want to send our beloveds out into the world to be seen as the lovely, rare birds they are? But the larger story for me is what was even better: he found a way to create these bonds for himself with his own two hands, his clever head, and his big lovable heart. For a mom who now knows exactly what it means to see kids fly from the nest, it meant he was one step closer to being launch-ready. It eased an anxiety I  had about this child, and gave me some indications that we are indeed, despite our long and curving road, actually moving forward.

Parenting teens can be challenging, especially over the unstructured summer months. Camps, trips, or even extended vacations might be just what the family ordered | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

This picture made me laugh out loud. American gothic goes to camp. But these are his people and they made his summer truly special.

For us at home, my son’s time at camp meant that we were off the parenting hook in a good way. Anybody who has stared down a summer with a wiley 15 year old boy feels my pain. Teens in general tend towards a state of downtime. Fifteen year old boys elevate this to an art form.  With endless options in the Netflix cue and a Snapchat filter for every mood, summer could have been for us one long, tedious conversation about what to do and when to do it. Not managing the program for an active 15 year old boy was a big plus on our end.

However, our greatest windfall was the new and improved version of our son that returned from his ten weeks in the wild. Savvy, skilled, and smarter, my son returned to us looking three inches taller and seeming light years older. It’s funny how just a little time apart changed our dynamics too. The breathing room we didn’t even know we needed actually gave us both some valuable time–to appreciate, to consider, to grow.

Now I’m not advocating that every child leave for the summer, but it wasn’t a negative for us. There are absolutely no regrets from him or from us about the choice we made this summer. Time apart was time well spent. In fact, for this child at this time in this family this time was a blessing we are still grateful for today.

And, next summer, if they’ll have him, I’ll send him away again in a heartbeat.

-Erin

Hey! Want to buy our new book? I Just Want to Be Perfect brings together 37 hilarious and relatable essays that showcase the foibles of ordinary women trying to be perfect.

I Just Want to Be Perfect

You can follow us on Google+, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.

Check out our books, “I Just Want to Be Alone” and “You Have Lipstick on Your Teeth.”

 

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10 Reasons to be Grateful Summer Isn’t Over Yet

We have reached the point of summer where we are ready to fly a white flag and surrender. Visions of summer fun are fermenting under a stack of musty pool towels, those dreams of beautiful family memories are fading, and the natives are more than restless. Hang in there, though. There is still much to love about the season. So pull yourself together, here are 10 reasons to be grateful summer isn’t over yet. Great summer recipes, great books to read, vacations to be had, great outdoor adventures, and family travel too! There is still plenty of summer fun to have! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

1. You can just add water.

One of summer’s finest points. From cranky toddlers to truculent teens, nothing will cure what ails them like a little H20. So feel free to toss those puppies into the nearest watering hole. Just make sure you keep them safe .

Great summer recipes, great books to read, vacations to be had, great outdoor adventures, and family travel too! There is still plenty of summer fun to have! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

2. You can appreciate nature.

Summer is when Nature is all dressed up and ready to party. Hungry for a gorgeous view? Got a hankering for some sparkling blue water? Just get thee and thine out into the Great Outdoors and drink it all in. Bonus: nature is the perfect buffer for your herd of traveling monkeys. Besides when you are hitting a trail, you can always hang back and pretend all that noise is coming from somebody else’s kid. Great summer recipes, great books to read, vacations to be had, great outdoor adventures, and family travel too! There is still plenty of summer fun to have! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

3. You can appreciate science.

Big shout-out to chemistry for protecting our kids from summer’s dangers with a marinade of DEET, chlorine, and SPF. Brussel Sprouts should totally counteract this.

4. You can toss your calendar.

Hitting snooze to our heart’s content, pushing back bedtimes in favor of chasing lightning bugs, and generally ignoring our to-do lists, we barely recognize ourselves in the summer. We love the easy, breezy nature of schedules with a little more wiggle room. Of course, this also gives our kids the freedom to constantly bug us for sleepovers. Nothing says easy like a house full of other people’s kids.

5. You can hit the road.

Erin jokes that her Native American name would be Have Minivan, Will Travel, while Ellen fills our Instagram feed with her travel exploits. But whether you are traveling internationally with a a big brood or just down the street with a more travel-sized crew, there are still days left to make great family memories. Great summer recipes, great books to read, vacations to be had, great outdoor adventures, and family travel too! There is still plenty of summer fun to have! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

6. You can keep cool and carry on.

God bless air conditioning for preventing fratricide and swamp butt. Our kids appreciate living to see the light of a new day and, well, crack sweat is not attractive on anybody.

7. You can channel your inner Olympian.

Nothing like a little international sports competition to kick your crew off Netflix for awhile. You can use the month-long celebration of athletic excellence to align everybody’s TV viewing habits or even inspire a little Olympic spirit among your own people. Great summer recipes, great books to read, vacations to be had, great outdoor adventures, and family travel too! There is still plenty of summer fun to have! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

8. You can have the Good Eats.

With fresh fruits and veggies available all season long, this is the time to really get excited about food. These recipes are some of our favorites! Great summer recipes, great books to read, vacations to be had, great outdoor adventures, and family travel too! There is still plenty of summer fun to have! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

9. You can actually read Good Books.

Summer’s more relaxed pace means that you might actually make it to the bottom of that pile of books on your bedside table. Here are some sizzling reads we are loving this summer. Great summer recipes, great books to read, vacations to be had, great outdoor adventures, and family travel too! There is still plenty of summer fun to have! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

10. You can admire the sunsets.

Nothing tames the beasts or quiets the soul quite like a setting sun, especially over the water.

Great summer recipes, great books to read, vacations to be had, great outdoor adventures, and family travel too! There is still plenty of summer fun to have! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

So take a deep breath and remember that summer’s time is fleeting. Make the most of its last few moments: you’ll be packing backpacks before you know it!

-Erin and Ellen

Hey! Want to buy our new book? I Just Want to Be Perfect brings together 37 hilarious and relatable essays that showcase the foibles of ordinary women trying to be perfect.

I Just Want to Be Perfect

You can follow us on Google+, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.

Check out our books, “I Just Want to Be Alone” and “You Have Lipstick on Your Teeth.”

 

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20 Must-Read Books Plus a Giveaway

What’s that, friends? You feel that gorgeous sunshine on your back and hear those birds chirping? Yup, it’s officially SUMMER! And to all the readers of the world, that means one very, very important thing: it’s time to dig into that summer reading list. These must-read books will brighten your summer as surely as ours!

Looking for the perfect beach book or captivating read to get lost in this season? We've got the list of the top 20 books that belong on your summer reading list. They all come with the reason WHY you need to snatch them up, not to mention this INCREDIBLE giveaway--11 books, a $225 Amazon giftcard. | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms
Been a little too distracted by the end-of-school insanity to bone up on what all hot summer reads are? No sweat! We’ve got you covered. Twenty of us blogging gals have teamed up with The Mom of the Year and Normal Level of Crazy virtual monthly book club to create a list of exactly what belongs on your summer reading list. Not only do these books come highly recommended (along with the reason you need to be reading them!), we are giving eleven of them away to one of you, along with a $225 Amazon giftcard. We know, it’s insanely awesome! More details on the giveaway at the end of the post. For now, log into Goodreads, grab a notepad or settle in with however you track your to-read list and start adding these titles. Looking for the perfect beach book or captivating read to get lost in this season? We've got the list of the top 20 books that belong on your summer reading list. They all come with the reason WHY you need to snatch them up, not to mention this INCREDIBLE giveaway--11 books, a $225 Amazon giftcard. | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

20 Books that Belong on Your Summer Reading List:

Looking for the perfect beach book or captivating read to get lost in this season? We've got the list of the top 20 books that belong on your summer reading list. They all come with the reason WHY you need to snatch them up, not to mention this INCREDIBLE giveaway--11 books, a $225 Amazon giftcard. | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

  1. Troublemaker: Surviving Hollywood and Scientology by Leah Remini (Toulouse and Tonic) is a GREAT summer read. Leah Remini doesn’t hold anything back, from her decades-long experience with Scientology to celeb encounters along the way, especially experiences within Scientology. If you want to hear all the dish on Tom Cruise, including his “Scientology arranged and groomed” girlfriend and then his marriage to Katie Holmes, get the book now. Her honesty and lack of pretense is refreshing. I couldn’t put it down!
  2. The Storied Life of A. J. Fikry by Gabrielle Zevin (The Not So Super Mom) This is a bit of a quirky book, but it is perfectly quirky without falling into the creepy or just plain confusing. A.J. Fikry is not the most immediately likable character but you find yourself rooting for him (and his bookstore) anyway. I appreciated that he was a bit of an oddball, because who in our lives isn’t without their own idiosyncrasies? I enjoyed the themes in this book–loss, romance, mystery–all peppered with humor and the format–each chapter moves the story forward in time and serves as an ode to one of Fikry’s favorite books–was different but enjoyable to any book lovers who try to find themselves in the stories they read.
  3. Smart Women by Judy Blume (Meraki Lane) I was a huge Judy Blume fan when I was a kid (Starring Sally J. Freedman As Herself was my favorite!), so it’s no surprise I jumped with joy when I discovered she writes novels for adults as well, and this book did NOT disappoint. If you like a light read with a little racy romance thrown in, this is the perfect summer pick!
  4. A Window Opens by Elizabeth Egan (Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms)  With its light, breezy touch, infinitely likable characters, and easily recognizable tensions, this book will sink its stealthy hooks into you and then spit you out an afternoon later. You will adore Alice, her kids, and her very believable relationship with her husband as much as we do. This may not be ground-breaking fiction, but it is a wholly satisfying, utterly delicious piece of literary pie.Looking for the perfect beach book or captivating read to get lost in this season? We've got the list of the top 20 books that belong on your summer reading list. They all come with the reason WHY you need to snatch them up, not to mention this INCREDIBLE giveaway--11 books, a $225 Amazon giftcard. | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms
  5. Beyond the Break by Kristen Mae (Kristen Mae) Quoted from Melissa Mowry of One Mother to Another‘s review on Amazon: “This book absolutely crushed me. The writing is hauntingly beautiful and full of depth, with well-rounded characters and gorgeous imagery. As a card-carrying heterosexual, I expected to feel a little squirmy about the girl-on-girl aspect and was just reading because I love this author’s writing. I was SO WRONG. The sex was, in a word, mind-blowing. None of that lazy, euphemistic smut book language (you won’t find talk of anyone’s blossoming flower here) just seriously hot, almost artistic love scenes. Hazel is a flawed but loveable main character with a haunting past and so much dimension. Claire is absolutely magnetic; even I was attracted to her. You owe yourself the pleasure–and I do mean pleasure–of reading this book. It will change everything you thought you knew about love, sexual attraction, and chemistry.”
  6. Summer Sisters by Judy Blume (Herd Management) Summer Sisters provides a fascinating view into the inner workings and dynamics of a close female friendship over the duration of their journey from young teens into adulthood. Many women will be able to relate to the power that female friends have over one another’s hearts, and their ability to shatter them completely sometimes. Riveting, relatable, and emotional.
  7. The Weekenders by Mary Kay Andrews (Confessions of a Mommyaholic) This summer/beach town set book is the absolute perfect read this summer while you are sitting beach or poolside that is filled with just enough intrigue, suspense, drama, romance and more.
  8. Mud Vein by Tarryn Fisher (See Mom Click) This is one of those books that draws you in and won’t let go, even after you’ve put it down. Senna Richard wakes up on her 33rdbirthday, locked in a house in the snow in the middle of nowhere, full of clues she has to piece together to gain her freedom. Not just a mystery, but a rip-your-heart-out love story, the author keeps you guessing while you become totally wrapped up in these characters’ lives.Looking for the perfect beach book or captivating read to get lost in this season? We've got the list of the top 20 books that belong on your summer reading list. They all come with the reason WHY you need to snatch them up, not to mention this INCREDIBLE giveaway--11 books, a $225 Amazon giftcard. | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms
  9. Dear Mr. You by Mary-Louise Parker (Shakespeare’s Mom) In this collection of personal essays, Parker writes beautifully about her encounters and relationships with various men in her life – everyone from her grandfather to ex-boyfriends, to, in an essay that manages to be both brutal and hilarious, a male goat. I read the whole book in one day. I had to ignore my children and personal hygiene to do it, but finding myself sucked into the book’s spellbinding word-webs was totally worth it.
  10. Not Without My Father by Andra Watkins (Andra Watkins) This story is a great summer read because we all struggle with loved ones. It’s an easy, yet poignant, read that changes a lot of people.
  11. Totto-chan: The Little Girl at the Window by Tetsuko Kuroyangi (Femme Frugality) This true story of alternative education in WWII era Japan serves to inspire. If you’ve ever known a kid that doesn’t seem to fit into a traditional education system, Tetsuko Kuroyangi’s story will warm your heart and give you hope. Kuroyangi, after getting kicked out of a traditional school, grew up to be one of Japan’s media sweethearts and a great, hands-on philanthropist.
  12. A Desperate Fortune by Susanna Kearsley (The Whimsy One) will take you on a waltz between present day and the 18th century as Sara (present day) tries to decipher a journal written by Mary during the Jacobites uprising in Paris (1732) what she discovers in the handwritten pages is not at all what she was expecting.Looking for the perfect beach book or captivating read to get lost in this season? We've got the list of the top 20 books that belong on your summer reading list. They all come with the reason WHY you need to snatch them up, not to mention this INCREDIBLE giveaway--11 books, a $225 Amazon giftcard. | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms
  13. Summerlong by Dean Bakopoulos (Jana Says) I fell in love with this author after reading another one of his books but this one, a stunning, sad, sometimes funny, heartbreaking, (mostly) realistic portrayal of a marriage in crisis and its subsequent implosion during a summer long Midwestern heatwave, solidified him in my top 5 favorite authors.
  14. What Alice Forgot By Liane Moriarty (Tamara (Like) Camera) This book gripped me – I felt all the joys and pains. I recommended it to both of my sisters who are still postpartum.
  15. Mosquitoland by David Arnold (Kiss My List) You will not regret spending an afternoon curled up with this smart, funny, and poignant novel about a teenage girl’s bus ride back to her mom in Cleveland. Mim’s journey from Mississippi is filled with people who could be fascinating main characters in their own books.
  16. Before the Fall by Noah Hawley (The Golden Spoons) Hawley alternates between perspectives of different characters as well as switches from past to present in this story of 11 people – some connected, some seemingly out of place – whose lives are changed or lost when their private jet goes down in the Atlantic Ocean off the coast of Martha’s Vineyard on a foggy August night.Looking for the perfect beach book or captivating read to get lost in this season? We've got the list of the top 20 books that belong on your summer reading list. They all come with the reason WHY you need to snatch them up, not to mention this INCREDIBLE giveaway--11 books, a $225 Amazon giftcard. | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms
  17. The Silkworm by Robert Galbraith (The Lieber Family) This second Cormoran Strike novel follows our detective as he investigates the disappearance and later death of a controversial, not-well liked author whose last novel didn’t have anything nice to say about…well, anyone!
  18. You: A Novel by Caroline Kepnes (Pulling Taffy) If you love a good, creepy thriller, with an occasional chuckle, this is a great summer read. By the end you will be rooting for the serial killer and hoping his intended victim dies (Please. End. Her. Incessant. Whining.)
  19. The Show by Filip Syta (Normal Level of Crazy) I’m taken by Amazon’s description of the book,Think of the greatest tech company in the world. Imagine getting a job there. Picture the perks: free gourmet food, free booze, a gym, a swimming pool, and a holiday bonus . . . every month. Brilliant coworkers. No dress code. Great parties. More money. Everyone’s admiration.” You know there are inevitably problems that will arise, but it sounds so exotic in comparison to my world, that I can’t wait to dig in!
  20. The Tulip Factory by Kacie Davis Idol (The Mom of the Year) Amazon’s description makes it sound like the perfect dreamy, fun summer book: “Before they exchange even a single word, Corrine knows that James will change everything. And sure enough, their serendipitous meeting in a North Carolina coffee shop sets off a whirlwind of desire and possibilities for the two.”

Looking for the perfect beach book or captivating read to get lost in this season? We've got the list of the top 20 books that belong on your summer reading list. They all come with the reason WHY you need to snatch them up, not to mention this INCREDIBLE giveaway--11 books, a $225 Amazon giftcard. | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms Now that you’ve got the whole list, we know you’re dying to immediately lose yourself in book pages, but don’t forget to first enter the fantastic giveaway here! Eleven of these books (Troublemaker: Surviving Hollywood and Scientology, The Storied Like of A.J. Fikry, The Weekenders, Not Without My Father, Totto-chan: The Little Girl at the Window, Beyond the Break, The Tulip Factory, The Show, A Desperate Fortune, Before the Fall, You: A Novel) are up for grabs in addition to a $225 Amazon giftcard! Delight in the books and use the giftcard to get any others that are on your summer reading list–or for this sweet amount, even snag a new Kindle for reading on-the-go! As long as you are 18 or older and live in the continental United States, you are eligible to enter the Rafflecopter below. All entries must be received before 7/8/16 at 5:30am ET. Here’s to a summer of great memories, books, and friends! Happy reading!

-Erin and Ellen

Looking for the perfect beach book or captivating read to get lost in this season? We've got the list of the top 20 books that belong on your summer reading list. They all come with the reason WHY you need to snatch them up, not to mention this INCREDIBLE giveaway--11 books, a $225 Amazon giftcard. | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

a Rafflecopter giveaway

****This post is not sponsored or compensated in any way. We are grateful to the following publishers for providing copies of the books for our giveaway: Penguin Random House, Simon & Schuster, Grand Central Publishing, Kristen Mae, Algonquin Books, Sourcebooks, Andra Watkins, St. Martin’s Press, Kodansha, and Inkshares. We bloggers have all chipped in together to provide the Amazon giftcard–because we love Amazon and we love you 😉 ****

Hey! Want to buy our new book? I Just Want to Be Perfect brings together 37 hilarious and relatable essays that showcase the foibles of ordinary women trying to be perfect.

I Just Want to Be Perfect

You can follow us on Google+, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.

Check out our books, “I Just Want to Be Alone” and “You Have Lipstick on Your Teeth.”

 

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10 Sizzling Summer Reads

Summer is the perfect time for hanging by the pool, putting your feet in the sand, and catching up on your reading. These sizzling summer reads are all winners and will pair nicely with just about anything you have planned. Looking for some great books for the pool, the beach, or even just the doctor's office? These 10 Sizzling Summer Reads are sure-fire winners | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

1. A Window Opens  by Elisabeth Egan

On the surface this book is nothing special, a familiar story about a SAHM who suddenly has to work full time. But “Danger, Will Robinson”, it’s the quiet ones that will get you. With its light, breezy touch, infinitely likable characters, and easily recognizable tensions, this book will sink its stealthy hooks into you and then spit you out an afternoon later. Erin adored Alice, her kids, and her very believable relationship with her husband. This may not be ground-breaking fiction, but it is a wholly satisfying, utterly delicious piece of literary pie.

2. My Name Is Lucy Barton by Elizabeth Strout

‘Tis the season for a baseball reference, so here goes: this book knocks it out of the park. The story is simple and unassuming on the surface: Lucy is recovering in a hospital bed when her estranged mom comes to visit. However, Lucy is no ordinary protagonist and Strout is a gifted writer so the results are literary fireworks. Small but mighty, this slim novel packs a lot of extraordinary into a tight, narrative thread. We both loved Strout’s other gem Olive Kitteridge, so we weren’t surprised by how wonderful this read was so much as profoundly grateful for another reason to worship at the altar of the inimitable Strout.

3. Modern Lovers by Emma Straub

Erin always considers it a good thing when she wants to throttle and hug the characters in equal measure. Straub’s story offers up characters that deliver on this front. College bandmates now mellowing in middle age, Elizabeth and Andrew who are married live down the street from old bandmate Zoe and her wife Jane. The band’s fourth member Lydia achieved some success on her own. When a film about Lydia’s life requires them all to touch the past, their present unravels a little at the seams. Straub’s deft hand controls the realistic tensions, steers the careful and realistic examination of midlife, and delivers characters that resonate. A satisfying, well-paced read by a gifted writer.

4. The Nest by Cynthia D’Aprix Sweeney

If you can judge a family by its flaws, the Plumbs are a perfect hot mess of a crew. They also couldn’t be more charming. The novel kicks off with the family inheritance in jeopardy after one of the siblings gets himself into hot water. As the four siblings wrestle with the mess left behind, it would be tempting to dismiss them as shallow or lacking substance. However, Sweeney gives each character multiple dimensions. She exposes their humanity and moves the story along. In doing so, their tale of personal woes, family ties, and thwarted ambitions is reminiscent of challenges we all face. A thoroughly entertaining read.

5. Dept. of Speculation by Jenny Offill

Marriage isn’t a straight narrative so much as a thousand shimmering moments—beautiful, terrible, and strange—and Offill lays them all out for us in this gripping, lovely book about what it means to take this particular trip. With her unique gift for plucking the extraordinary from the everyday, Offill doesn’t just offer up moments from a marriage but gives us glimpses of the diamonds hidden in the rough patches as well. Offill’s structuring of the story can be the reader’s hard work. Through her careful curation of snippets from the marriage at the heart of this novel, Offill leaves the reader asking on every page—how do these pieces fit together? what does this mean here? Yet it’s these tenuous but important questions that serve the story she is trying to tell and give the reader a satisfying and wonderful read. dept-of-speculation-web

6. The Admissions by Meg Mitchell Moore

Nothing quite captures the emotional pressure cooker of the admissions process quite like this utterly delectable piece of fiction. The Hawthornes are a family so familiar you feel from the first page like you might be reading about your next door neighbors. As their oldest gets put through the wringer applying to Harvard, dad’s alma mater, so do the rest of them. Things unravel, secrets surface, and everyone responds to the demands of the process in different ways. In real life, this would be heart-breaking and soul-crushing. In a book, all the elements jive beautifully for an immensely enjoyable read for you that will make you grateful for your own process in comparison.

7. The Lake House  by Kate Morton

Summer is a great time to dive in to a juicy mystery. After a lovely party at the lake house, the Edevane family’s 11 month old son Theo goes missing. Morton’s page turner takes this pivotal moment in a family’s history and creates something special and utterly unputdownable. Told from two vantage points–2003 London and 1930s Cornwall–this book will have you ignoring kids just to figure out what is happening and where this story will go. As always, Morton’s gift for managing complicated story lines while simultaneously creating well-developed characters will make you grateful for all that extra time you have to read by the pool.

8. Me Before You by Jojo Moyes

Before this one was a movie, it was a delicious book club read of ours. In a nutshell, a young woman loses her job and then goes to work for a young quadriplegic, but that’s just on the book jacket. There is so much meat to this tale. The relationship that develops between Louisa and Will doesn’t just touch the reader, it makes you reevaluate the line between ordinary and extraordinary and the paths we take to get where we need to go. It also launched a great book club discussion which is, of course, the very best endorsement.

9. The Widow by Fiona Barton

Don’t read the dust jacket: this book is neither Gone Girl nor The Girl on the Train, both books we really, really liked even with their creepy, psychological suspense. It IS a great read though. In fact, it reminded us more of Leanne Moriarty’s The Husband’s Secret with the marital secrets and the mystery at the heart of it. Sometimes, multiple points of view can be distracting, but in this case, the structure of the novel contributes to some of the magic. Be forewarned: you could easily lose an afternoon falling down this delightful rabbit hole, but the pay-off is worth it!

10. East of Eden by John Steinbeck

We know what you are thinking: “Um, ladies, this is actually literature. Not chick lit. Not a beach read. This will not go well with my margarita and chillaxing.” We beg to disagree. We’ll concede that this IS literature at its finest. Steinbeck did win the Nobel Prize for Literature after this one after all, but this powerful epic narrative of two families as they rise and fall and love and lose is exactly what you need to get your heart racing. Sexy as hell, East of Eden is dangerous too. Sure, people like to chalk it up to a modern retelling of Adam and Eve, but that simplification doesn’t do this story justice. Steinbeck picks at our fundamental desire to find love and be found and  joins us in our search for the answer to the question “who am I really?” He gets that humanity is flawed perfection itself and he has given us a novel that wraps this all up in one deliciously enticing tale. Take the apple, friends. You will be rewarded.

Speaking of great reads, have you seen our new book,

I Just Want to Be Perfect?

With 37 hilarious and relatable essays that showcase the foibles of ordinary women trying to be perfect, it is just as great whether you are hanging our poolside, by the beach, or even just the doctor’s office.

I Just Want to Be Perfect

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How to Prevent Bikini Line Bumps

Get summer ready! How to Prevent Bikini Line Bumps. Have you tried everything to prevent bikini line bumps? Think again. You may not have tried this cheap, painless, and easy solution. | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

I have always been plagued by bikini line bumps.

Okay relax. There will be no pictures because TMI is not my thing, and I try rather diligently not to mortify my teens.

What is my thing is sharing brilliant solutions . . . that drop into my lap. You know how when you’re shopping around online and there are suggested products that pop up in the sidebar? Well, sometimes it’s terrifying how spot-on the internet elves who choose the recommendations actually are.

About a month ago, an electric razor popped up for me.

Panasonic razor

And now it’s living in my bathroom because review after review said it gave a close shave without a rash. Maaaaayyybbeee everything you read on the internet isn’t exactly true, but for $19.99 it was a no-brainer after what I have spent to banish those little bumps.

I have tried waxing and it made my skin very, very angry. And then I tried waxing again when I was fed the hype that it was actually dirty wax that caused the bumps. First of all, ewwwwww. Secondly, I’m pretty sure it was the molten hot wax ripping the hairs out by the roots that played a major part. I not only got a rash immediately after the torture, I got ingrown hairs when they started to grow back through my traumatized skin.

Oh, and then I tried laser hair removal: fairly painful, REALLY expensive, and a total waste of time for me. Sure the hair was sparser, but there was still hair so what was the point? I just had a little less hair to remove with some other method. I even went through two rounds spaced months apart to catch the hair that was in a dormant growing phase during the first round. Apparently, I have hairs that plaque me every other day now with their growth spurts, but were napping during the entire eight months of laser time. Sure.

That left me with plain ol’ shaving . . . and bumps all of the time. I tried depilatories like Nair, but who has that kind of time? And that smell? Yuck.

So basically, tons of money and time later, I was relegated to wear bathing suits with skirts. Now, don’t get me wrong, skirted suits are super cute, but sometimes you want to be able to choose something else.

But I have freedom of choice once again thanks to the Panasonic ES2207P Ladies Electric Shaver! Within one week of using it with post-shaving dabs of my secret solution of antibiotic and cortisone creams, my bikini line was smooth and clear. (More about that in a bit.)

Razor Pop Up

You can use this razor wet or dry and the charge lasts forever. The pop-up trimmer is what gets in there close, but it honestly doesn’t get quite as close as a regular razor so I have to use it every day. I have no problem with that because the bumps are banished! Also, I no longer have any ingrown hairs because the hair is not short enough to get trapped when it starts to grow. I use the tiny dabs of antibiotic and cortisone cream after each use once I dry off to make sure everything stay smooth and clear.

Cortisone and Antibiotic

So there you have it. This isn’t a sponsored post (it does contain affiliate links: you can buy it here), I just wanted to share the solution I have been searching out for decades. Hallelujah! No go forth and enjoy bathing suit season any way you see fit. The freedom is yours now.

-Ellen 

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Most Dangerous Time of the Year in a Pool: Tips to Swim Safe

When I was a lifeguard, this moment right at the start of the the season was the most dangerous time of the year in a pool. In my seven years guarding, most of my saves were young swimmers in the first few weeks after opening. Kids came back to the neighborhood watering hole after a long winter and jumped right into the water fully expecting to swim like their end-of-summer-super- strong-swimmer selves. Their relative weakness after a long hiatus would bring on panic and cause them to flounder. Either that or they would sink like stones in their first jump off the diving board. Even now with my pool-running days way back in my rearview mirror, I still get anxious at the opening of the season and for good reason.

It's the most dangerous time of the year in a pool. Some tips to stay swim safe this summer! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

A couple of years ago, our friend hosted her annual End of School/Welcome Summer pool party. With tables overflowing with yummy eats, good friends brimming with conversation, and a pool full of splashing, happy kids, we were all in a happy, relaxed place. This is not to say that we weren’t vigilant. In fact, the sides of the pool were lined with moms and dads watching their kids play or even in the water with them. But the pool was packed full, there was a lot of splashing and carrying on, and in the end, even with lots of eyes on and in the water, nobody saw the tragedy that almost played out in front of us.

It's the most dangerous time of the year in a pool. Some tips to stay swim safe this summer! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

What to expect at an end of year pool party

I was busy refereeing a disagreement over a pool noodle, when a woman I barely knew walked over to me with a crying little girl in her arms.

“I just wanted to let you know how grateful I am to your son. He just pulled my little girl off the bottom of the pool.”

My eyes found my ten year old breathing heavy on the side of the pool. He had been swimming underwater trying out his new goggles when he saw the little girl on the bottom. He reacted quickly, grabbed her by her polka dot suit straps and yanked her to the surface. The little girl was a new swimmer and had slipped down the slope that led from the shallow end to deeper water. It was a common mistake, but her panic at not being able to put her foot down rattled her. When she panicked, she got some water in her mouth and ended up on the bottom of the pool. The scariest part: not one single adult sitting on the edge or swimming near her saw her go under. This is the stuff that stops my heart, scary movies be damned.

Our story is one of a near miss and we are grateful for it, but this scenario is common this time of year. In fact, at another pool party the same time the next year, I jumped in fully dressed to pull another five year old to safety. It’s the most dangerous time of the year in a pool. So what can you do?

First of all, the very best thing you can do for your kids if you plan to even look at water this summer is make sure everyone can swim. Find a reputable place for some lessons and then commit the time and resources to get this one done. But there is a caveat to this very sage advice: real lessons shouldn’t start until age 4. Swimming lessons are not a replacement for common  sense and they can give a false sense of security. By all means, have your kids take lessons as early and often as you are able, but know this truth: just because your child can swim a little and very young kids can swim, it does not mean they have enough stamina to swim out and then back to safety, a key marker of a competent swimmer.

It's the most dangerous time of the year in a pool. Some tips to stay swim safe this summer! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

Second, make a hard and fast rule that no one enters ANY body of water (even backyard kiddie pools) without a buddy. Accidents happen even to great swimmers, even in inches of water. Even with people watching. Lots of people.

It's the most dangerous time of the year in a pool. Some tips to stay swim safe this summer! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

Third, never leave a swimming child unattended. We both have kids who have spent a season or five on a swim team and would easily qualify as strong swimmers. There is no way we would let any of our kids ever swim unattended. We’ll say it again: accidents happen even to great swimmers, even in inches of water.

So stay swim safe out there, folks! Summer fun is right around the corner and we wouldn’t want anything to spoil your fun!

It's the most dangerous time of the year in a pool. Some tips to stay swim safe this summer! | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

-Erin 

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My Feelings About Back to School Are Wildly Unpopular With the Internet

My Feelings About Back to School Are Wildly Unpopular with the Internet | Parenting | Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

I am in a funk, a melancholy, a fog of stone-cold dread. I really need someone to stroke my hair and whisper sweet comforts in my ear, but I can’t ask for commiseration, or even a cookie, for fear of sounding sanctimonious. You see, while pictures of moms jumping for joy and toasting the camera in celebration of the first day of school are flooding my Facebook and Instagram feeds; I just want to eat a pound of the snickerdoodles no one is offering me because I DREAD THE START OF SCHOOL.

There, I said it. And if you’re Team Jump for Joy, it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with me. I’m glad you’re happy! I would fart glitter over your joy if it wasn’t so environmentally unsound. I understand why parents are ready for their spawn to go back because we all need five. minutes. to. ourselves. for the love of all that is good and wholesome.

And the whining, oh my goodness, the whining. It’s too hot to shove them outside, and if you have to referee one more cage match over the iPad, you’re going to go Amish. Camps have almost bankrupted you and you can’t escape your kids’ grubby paws long enough to do a load of laundry, let alone lounge with a novel.

See? I get it. No pitchfork poking or torch wielding necessary. But I am in mourning over school starting, and I want to stop feeling like a freak about it. Here are my arguments for why my cheerless attitude does not earn me a “sancti” tacked onto my “mommy.” Hear me out.

1. I am getting a redo of my childhood. This can be true for anyone, but it’s especially bittersweet for me. When I was growing up, I split my time between hiding in my room from the bipolar tension that thrummed through my house, and melting outside in the Maryland humidity trying to tag along with a gang of neighborhood kids who definitely did not want me joining in their reindeer games. My kids may think the blueberry picking-hiking-gardening-swimming-canoeing-waterfall frolicking-sand castle building are all about them, but they’re a lot about me putting my past behind me.

2. When my kids where small I didn’t work outside the home. I didn’t have the constant tug and pull between work and childcare threatening to shred my sanity. I just had excuses to splash through water parks and craft masterpieces out of egg cartons. Now that I do work from home, my kids are teens and more than happy to sleep until noon to give me the writing time I need, which brings me to my next point . . .

3. My kids are teens and their school-time schedules are crushing. The homework, the projects, the games, the concerts, the competitions, oh my. And that is not even including the carousal of their social lives. I actually have less work time during the school year because my “freedom” ends at 2:30 PM and the driving in circles lasts until 9:30 PM.

4. I am not a morning person, a.k.a. “lazy” in the eyes of early risers. Talk about a group who’s sanctimonious. I only want to sleep until 8:00 AM. Is that so wrong? I thought there would be some magic switch when I reached adulthood that would make getting up early easy. As far as I know, there isn’t one because getting up at 6:15 AM is still an act of torture. If you know of such a switch, you should market that on one of those late night infomercials. Because that’s when your audience would be awake. Get it? You could bank some serious coin.

5. Let’s get back to “my kids are teens.” My oldest is a senior. A SENIOR! This is the last summer of spinning in the world as I know it, or at least how I have known it for seventeen years. Next year’s back to school will mean shuttling my girl off to her future and making my nest just a little more empty. What? I have allergies, dammit. IT’S JUST ALLERGIES! Give me a moment . . .

6. Okay, let’s end this list on a rallying point, common ground, something on which we can all agree. PTA/PTO/Boosters/Friends of the School: no matter what you call it, the meetings kill just a little more of your soul each and every time you attend one. Remember that senior I was sniffling over? That means I have been squeezing my tush into school desks for close to thirteen years. My soul is on life support. I know they are necessary, and not always evil, but you know what? I’m going to stop here because if you love these particular coffee clatches of blackboard politics, I’ve insulted you past the brink of indignation anyway. Go ahead and burn my effigy; it’ll make you feel good. Maybe even sanctimonious.

But for those of you I haven’t offended, could we maybe all agree not to judge? For every mom clicking her heels, there may be a mom in need of a hug because her cohorts in fun have gone back to their educational grinds. And if you fall into the latter group, come sit next to me and have a cookie. I understand.

-Ellen

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9 Reasons to Kick Your Kids Outside

We are better, kinder, gentler parents outside. True, we are also sweatier, dirtier, and more likely to be doused with copious amounts of DEET, but the good so far outweighs the uncomfortable here that we stopped noticing. In any case, we have strong, rock solid arguments for why you need to kick your clan out into the great blue yonder.

1. Nothing connects a family like no Wifi.

Seriously. If you have fantasies of logging some serious hours of family togetherness with cards, charades, or even just actual conversation, drop your family in the closest wilderness you can rustle up. Just remember to bring a map and compass, because nothing ensures that this memory will move from good to godawful-must-recount-at-Thanksgiving-dinner-until-the-end-of-time like getting lost together without your phone’s GPS.

Want better parenting? Take your kids outside. Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

 

2. Wanna talk? Lace up those hiking boots.

Sulky teens and moody toddlers can both bring civil discourse to a screaming halt or entrench themselves in conversational stalemates worthy of a white flag. In any case, the cure for what is ailing your familial discussion is movement. Take this show on the road. Something about the fresh air and the one-foot-in-front-of-the-other nature of a trail gets the conversation juices flowing again.

Reasons to kick your kids outside---Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

 

3. Water cures all.

Great literature and religious traditions everywhere will back us up: water is a godsend. Sure, water can end epic droughts and convert the faithless masses, but that’s nothing compared to what it will do for a cranky kid, prickly pre-teen, or tetchy teen. Just add water and watch the magic happen. So get your cranky crew to a pool, lake, ocean, or even neighborhood swimming hole. You can even count that as a bath that day too. Tell your mother-in-law we told you so. Win, win, win.

Reasons to kick your kids outside--Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

 

4. They learn stuff.

Put away the summer reading and workbooks. If you are stressing about your kids’ brains turning to mush under the weight of a hundred unstructured days, we have the antidote to your anxiety. There is literally no end to what your kids can learn outside. Sure, they can learn useful skills like reading a map and compass or glean great information about local plants, animals, and history. But by far the most valuable thing they learn is the things you don’t teach them. It may look like boredom but there is important brain work being done when they are lying in the grass like that drooling on themselves. At least that’s what we keep telling ourselves.

Reasons to kinck your kids outside--Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

 

5. Nature is the best of buffers.

This far into summer we don’t need to tell you that kids are loud. Really, really loud. And messy. And stinky. And did we mention loud? The great outdoors welcomes all that kids have to offer and then offers this back: a place for them to be fully themselves without things like pesky walls or carpets to clean. Bonus: kids outside are not as loud as pictured.

Reasons to kick your kids outside--Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

 

6. Cheap Thrills

Nature inspires their creativity and ignites their wonder. This is a fancy way of saying that once you get them out there, you don’t need to do much. Just sit back and watch them play.

Reasons to kick your kids outside--Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

 

7.  Unleash their inner warriors.

By this point in the summer, they are starting to use that b-word we all hate. Banish the boredom just by opening the door. Let their “What I did This Summer” essays start with “I found adventure”.

Reasons to kick you kids outside--Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

 

8. Build their tribe.

Nothing makes a bunch of individuals a team like some shared adventures. Create the ties that bind by offering them opportunities to make memories that will last a lifetime.

Reasons to kick yourself outside--Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

 

9. Just do it.

Show them some of the amazing things that can happen when they leave their calm, cool, air-conditioned safe space behind and just jump.

Reasons to kick your kids outside--Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms

Go on now, unplug that XBOX, save the Netflix marathon for next week, and get out there already!

-Erin and Ellen

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6 Ways the Carnival is Just Like Gifted and Talented Camp

Have you gotten to that point in the summer where–if your kids are anything like ours–you can actually see the knowledge oozing out of their ears like a Popsicle melting on a parking lot seven inches away from the concession stand?

Was this the summer you weren’t going to let that happen?

Did you gather brochures for stats camp, space camp, ninja training, and that Rodin sculpting seminar, but they’ve now been used one by one for fly swatters and gum-parking stations?

Did you have every intention of making multiplication flash cards, but haven’t mustered the enthusiasm to buy the index cards or to install the app or to use the calculator on your phone?

Did you purchase the ingredients for that Thunderstorm in a Cup experiment you saw on Pinterest, but they are still clanking around in your trunk with the jumper cables?

Did you check out the entire Charles Dickens collection with every intention of constructing a kicky homage diorama with your kids, but the books are way past due and the librarians are starting to don brass knuckles when you enter the building?

Yeah, summer enrichment seems like a great idea in April when the air is warming and life feels fresh and new. But then the End of  School Year Gomorrah sucks the life out of you with the endless sports banquets AND field trips AND plays AND concerts AND awards assemblies so that even packing school lunches makes you want to strangle a bluebird.

Then summer hits with its breezy schedule and you think, “We all deserve a little break before buckling down,” and before you know it, the only exam your kids can pass is the swim test and you have the motivation of a sloth at a sleep convention to do anything about it.

Don’t bother searching for those brochures! They’re gone; get over it. We have a real solution! TAKE ‘EM TO THE CARNIVAL!

What? Don’t roll your eyes at us. Allow us to construct the excuse justification reasoning, so that by the end of all this, you’ll be calling your accountant to write off the whole adventure as an education expense.

This summer, can you actually see the knowledge oozing out of your kids' ears like a Popsicle melting on a parking lot? Our solution? The carnival is just like gifted and talented camp. Really. From Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms.

Six Ways the Carnival is Just Like Gifted and Talented Camp

1. Future Surgeons of America

Why just learn about how the colon works when you can see it in action? Experiment with how quickly a $3.00 chili dog with three pumps of pseudo-cheese and extra relish can initiate a colon cleanse in a 40 year old woman. Which leads us to . . .

2. Olympians R Us

The Race to the Port-A-Potty Dash where we ALL win if she makes it in time. Watch her hurdle small children and hold in sharts with absolutely no grace whatsoever.

3. Smithsonian Simulation

The carnival is tons better than any textbook. It’s living history really. Where else can you hear a theatrical re-telling of “Tales of  Severed Fingers and the Ferris Wheels That Caused Them” by a safety inspector who was alive during the Civil War?

4. Junior Scientists

Two words: Ball. Pit. So much surface area for so many germs. Each child can get a different disease: ebola, and chiggers, and warts, oh my! Experience is so much better than any book learnin’. CDC here we come!

5. Shakespearean ‘Xperiences

There are OODLES of opportunities for grammar lessons . . . and that’s just in the line to get ride tickets. Explain how the eff bomb is a noun, verb, and an adjective. Oh, and the reading opportunities are so varied and fun! There are signs everywhere–goodies such as “No urinating on the electrical cords” and “May cause death or mutilation.”

That brings us to everyone’s favorite . . .

6. Mathletes Mania

Your child will be able to ace the SATs before they hit puberty with problems like these:

If an unlimited ride bracelet costs a bazillion dollars and 20 tickets costs a bajillion dollars divided by 2 (take into account every ride takes an odd number of tickets, but they are only sold in even sets), how big is the second mortgage you must take out on your home to prevent your child leaving the carnival in tears because they were denied one last chance to spew chunks of their neon blue snow cone on the Tilt-A-Whirl?

See? SEE!? You a believer now? You’re welcome. Now go call your accountant about that tax break and tell them the Sensible Moms sent you.

-Ellen and Erin

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